Sunday, May 24, 2015

Wanderlust

Maybe it's the epic Noah-esque floods we've been having in Texas... maybe a little cabin fever... probably a little bit of seeing everyone's vay-cay pics on Facebook... but I'm ready to get out of dodge. I need some R & R so bad I even Googled travel times from Dallas to Phuket, Thailand (yes, it's a real place... and yes, it seems like it's too far unless one is sitting in first class). And naturally, when someone has wanderlust and is trying to figure out which waterfront travel location to check off her bucket list, she has to make sure she has the proper wardrobe. So... swimsuits.
I noticed an interesting trend in swimwear this year that has me confused... I've spent decades trying to find the perfect bandeau tops with removable or tuck-able straps so I can avoid crazy tan lines (*Soapbox moment: tanning is bad; wear sunscreen. Carry on). But this year the trend seems to be all about crazy, wacky straps sure to leave one with THE most awkward tan lines... ever. Exhibits A, B, C, D, etc. come straight from one of my go-to swimsuit suppliers - Victoria's Secret (some of you won't read this blog... and you won't have any problem with the straps... dudes).








So clearly chicks buy suits like these to be seen - but when they get home from their 48-hour trip to Vegas where they consumed bottomless Mai Tais, does the awkward sunburnedness phase them? Do they then spend more hours in the sun trying to correct the tan lines? Those tan lines peeking out of a business suit at the office... hot? And they do realize these pics are photoshopped, right? I'm thinking muffin top would be an issue in these suits. What about all of our curves trying to force their way out of all those straps? I shudder at the thought.
So what do you think about this trend?
And of course, my search for the perfect bandeau this year continues because the Victoria's Secret suits seem to get smaller and smaller every year (or my butt keeps getting bigger - probably a combination of the two?). Then I came across this other website... where one actually has to choose between regular "triangles" and the "perky triangles." Decisions, decisions.


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