The Gridiron Goddess

O-M-GEEEE

2012-01-30T23:48:00.017-05:00

Wow, I can't believe how long it's been since I've posted. Feels like so much has happened! Well, it has! Family trip to L.A. for the holidays, the Mrs. Texas pageant... the last month-and-a-half has been a whirlwind. I'll do my best to try to get caught up - I'll post some pics soon from the L.A. trip, but tonight, I've got something much more important to talk about....

Mrs. Texas 2012....

The pageant was Saturday, January 21st in Corsicana. This was going to be my year. I was getting a dress custom-made based off of a red dress Nina Dobrev wore to an awards show a while back. I had a swimsuit designer custom-designing a competition suit for me. I'd been working my butt off - literally - training at least twice a week with my trainer while fitting in workouts between work, family, etc. I had the hair going on, the eyelashes, the fake nails. I'd been practicing my walk and poses, working on study questions to prepare for interview. I was ready. Yes, this was going to be my year...

Well, it just wasn't meant to be. So many things happened that were beyond my control that just kept stacking the cards against me. It almost became a bit of a comedy! I just had to laugh sometimes to keep from crying!

Without getting into any detail, I had to improvise with my pageant wardrobe this year. Fortunately, I'd ordered a back up bathing suit to wear (you've always got to have a back up because anything can happen - and it did). I felt good in it, but didn't feel amazing. You've got to feel AMAZING when you're on that stage or it shows.

My evening gown didn't quite work out either. I had a back up all ready to go - my white dress that got me into the top five the previous two years was on standby. Problem is, I lost some weight for the pageant this year and the dress didn't fit properly. Not to mention the fact that I never got the dress cleaned after the pageant last year. It just wasn't stage ready and I wouldn't have felt good in it.

Fortunately, one of my fellow contestants (Whitney) let me borrow her "back up" gown. When I saw the dress, I almost passed out - it was beautiful. I thought, "If this is her back-up dress, what does her "dress-dress" look like?" The dress was stunning and fit like a glove. I had to spend two hours steaming it the day of the pageant, but it was so worth it! The irony of it all is that I ended up winning the evening gown award - IN SOMEONE ELSE'S DRESS! That pretty much sums up the craziness that was the pageant this year. Here is a shot Ryan managed to get at the pageant - formal pics from Larry Wright will be here shortly and you know I'll share!

Dealing with my wardrobe drama was enough to send me over the edge. Fortunately for me, I kind of roll with the punches and refused to let these issues destroy the pageant experience.

We took our opening number shots before orientation Thursday before the pageant....

Then some of us got together for a Zumba class in the parking lot of the Holiday Inn Express - good times! We were grooving! We wrapped up the night at Chili's - lots of grilled chicken at that table.

The following morning, we were up early for rehearsals...

Then headed to the Corsicana Country Club for lunch...

Then we went back to the theater for more rehearsals...

That evening, we had our annual dinner with the hubbies. Bless Ryan's heart - he drove all the way to Corsicana for the dinner, just to turn back around and head home to Frisco, just to come back to Corsicana the next day for the pageant. He's a trooper.

A highlight of our pageant weekend is our karaoke outing. Last year, I convinced one other person (DaLana) to come with me to the Two Doors Down coffee shop for karaoke. This year, we had a whole group! It was awesome! We ended up naming it "Karaoke with the Double Ds" (Dawn and DaLana) - the irony being that both of us have to use chicken cutlets when we get up on that stage during the pageant! But karaoke was just a blast - we sang everything from Bohemian Rhapsody to Etta James "At Last." (DaLana can actually sing beautifully, and she sang the song wonderfully - a touching tribute because we'd lost Etta James earlier that day). Karaoke with the Double Ds was definitely a highlight of the weekend!

The next morning, we were back at the theater for rehearsal at 8am.

Once rehearsals were done, it was game time - time to head back to the hotel to get ready for the first part of the competition - interviews! I knew I was going to wear the same interview suit again this year - it's so perfect and the color is amazing! I feel great in the dress. I wish I could say I didn't have a problem with it either, but the inner-lining was hanging a bit low and I had to scramble to get it taped and put in place before heading downstairs for my interview. It worked out (thank God for double stick tape).

Interview is always one of my strong points - y'all know I can talk and hold a good conversation. Unfortunately, I let a last minute judging change throw me off of my game, and I wasn't happy with how I'd done. I was told later that my interview was good but I know I could've done better, and like every other year, I had the BEST answers for all of my questions after the interview was over.

Frazzled from my interview, it was hard for me to get my mind right. I even left my contestant number in my hotel room! But it was game time - I managed to get it together so I could throw down on the stage.

Opening number went great. Round 1 of swimsuit and evening gown went well also. I even had someone tell me I looked the best I'd ever looked while competing. That calmed me down a bit - I needed to hear that because my confidence had been shaken.

They called the top 15 - I was relieved when I heard my name. The way the pageant weekend had been going, anything was possible. Had my name not been called, I wouldn't have been surprised.

We competed again in swimsuit and evening gown. Again, I felt great! I might even say I felt pretty confident. Sort of. I still had this weird feeling that things were just off. So when they called the top five, and the last name called wasn't mine, I was sad. Not devastated - I didn't rush off the stage crying or anything. I was slightly shocked, but not really. Disappointed - yes. It just wasn't supposed to be my year. The sad thing is - the top five question this year was about little girls and fairytales. After spending almost two hours in line at Disneyland last month so Bryn could take pics with the princesses, I would've nailed that question.

Kayla Wharton was crowned Mrs. Texas at the end of the night. I know she'll do a great job - she's already set a goal of breaking the appearance record for the year. I have to congratulate my fellow contestants on a job well done. The competition was fierce this year, but we still managed to have a great time. That's why I keep going back every year.

The rest of the weekend was just odd. Total strangers came up to me and told me they had me in their top 5. I woke up the morning after the pageant thinking, "What the H happened last night? What did I do wrong? What could I have done differently? How did I not get into that top 5?" I drowned my sorrows in a cinnamon roll, a bisquit covered in gravy and a couple pieces of bacon. Ah.... it felt good to eat again.

Looking back, I had my first real lesson regarding the subjectivity of pageants. Same night, same contestants, different judges - there might've been a different outcome. The good news is I plan on competing again - looks like the next competition will be December 1st. Lots of lessons learned this year - there is plenty I will do differently. But one thing that won't change is that I'll continue being me - a wife, mother, careerwoman - and if I'm supposed to be Mrs. Texas, I'll be Mrs. Texas with a little bit of cellulite and a whole lotta REAL!

Thanks again to my sponsors, and a special shout out to Bonnie Benavidez of Avasiare. She hooked my make-up up again and did her thing!

See you in Corsicana in December!

To be continued....

2012-01-12T21:08:00.003-05:00

Miss me??? I certainly have missed writing and updating the blog. With the Mrs. Texas pageant right around the corner, things have been CRAZY! But updates coming soon - I promise!

Love!

2011-12-08T23:41:00.002-05:00

I saw this pic today of Paula Patton and got all giddy. The photography is spectacular - everything about this picture is wonderful. Then I read the quote. Good stuff.

"Being a mom has taught me that you don’t know your limit until you are faced with it. You have to just keep ploughing through and somehow you make it."

God Sighting

2011-12-07T13:02:00.003-05:00

Do you ever have those moments that just take your breathe away??? I call them God-sightings. In those moments, I witness and am reminded of the presence of God in my life. I had one this morning.

Today was a bit of a bummer. Allen Wilson's funeral was today in Buffalo, and Ryan and I were pretty bummed we couldn't get up there for the service. I was doing some reflecting when I saw the most amazing thing. I turned down a street near my office when I saw this:

The trees were crying leaves. It was stunning. The ground was covered with leaves. Leaves were slowly but steadily falling off of the trees. It was picturesque - like something out of a movie. I drove by in awe and finally decided to drive around the block so I could stop and take a picture. I wanted to remember this amazing sight.

God sightings. Gotta love them.

Cancer Sucks!

2011-12-03T19:30:00.008-05:00

Wow - in a little over a week, we've lost three people to cancer. Last week after Thanksgiving, we lost Uncle David to prostate cancer. David was adopted into the family years ago and he was like a brother to my mom.

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Yesterday, we lost Andre Coe to brain cancer. Andre was one of my brother-in-law's best friends. I had the pleasure of being escorted down the aisle by Andre at my sister's wedding in 2010. We saw him just a few months ago when my sister and AC were in town. He was doing well, still driving even and bowling. He even busted out some push ups in our living room when an impromptu testosterone-fueled contest began. But not so long ago, his doctors informed him there was not much more they could do. Andre Coe passed away yesterday at the age of 36.

DALLAS — Andre Coe, a former editorial assistant in the Dallas bureau of The Associated Press and the cooperative's regional news desk in Phoenix, died Friday. He was 36.

During his career at the AP, Coe reported from the Texas Gulf Coast in the wake of Hurricane Ike in 2008, and was one of the first reporters to arrive at the scene of a bus crash that killed 17 passengers in Sherman earlier that year. He wrote about the 45th anniversary of the assassination of President John F. Kennedy and the return of US Airways Capt. Chesley "Sully" Sullenberger, who successfully landed a passenger jet in the Hudson River in 2009, to his hometown of Denison.

"Andre would appear in our cramped newsroom after a long day out in the wet heat of a summer disturbed by Ike, drop a backpack heavy with gear, and inquire about our story," said David Scott, the AP's Central Regional editor. "Invariably, it was a story for which he'd again earned the byline, having dictated throughout the day the details and interviews that made it work."

Coe had just started working as an editorial assistant at the AP's West Regional desk in 2010 when he was diagnosed with brain and lung cancer.

"Andre was an inspiration to everyone he met," said Dale Leach, AP's Chief of Bureau for Texas, Oklahoma and Louisiana. "Even when his body was failing, his spirit remained hopeful and uplifting. We will miss his presence, but always remember his spirit."

Coe was born in Fort Worth and grew up in Abilene. He graduated from the University of Texas with a degree in sociology in 2000 and returned to the school to earn a second degree in journalism in 2003.

Before coming to the AP, Coe was a reporter at the Montgomery (Ala.) Advertiser and the Dallas Examiner. He also had interned at the Austin American-Statesman and the Abilene Reporter-News.

"He said his biggest accomplishment was being a journalist, working where he could tell other people's stories," said Kim Bogney, one of Coe's three siblings.

He was a member of the Phi Beta Sigma fraternity, where his nickname was Aries, for his warrior spirit, she said. Coe was an ROTC cadet and also a huge sports fan.

While battling his illness, Coe would often visit his colleagues and joke about the weight and hair he lost during his treatment for cancer. He was a constant upbeat presence on Facebook.

"He remained happy, joyful and positive even while being fully cognizant of what he was facing and he truly inspired everyone who knew him during that period because he fought that battle joyfully," said Matt Curry, a reporter in the AP's Dallas bureau, who became good friends with Coe as they worked together at night.

While Coe was ill, he wrote a book of humorous stories about his life titled "The Life and Times of a Curly Headed Kid from West Texas."

"Andre was very carefree," Bogney said. "He lived his life. He didn't leave anything on the table."

Coe is survived by his mother, Irene Coe of Abilene; two sisters, Vickie Hall of Plano and Kim Bogney of Allen; and a brother, Anthony Coe of Round Rock. Funeral services are pending.

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And then today, we got word that a friend of ours from Buffalo, Allen Wilson, passed away. Allen was a writer for the Buffalo News and covered the Bills games while Ryan was on the team. Years ago, we were both traveling to New Orleans for a preseason game and got stranded in the airport due to weather. Back on an early a.m. flight the next morning, we struck up a friendship. We talked about our children - his baby girl was not too much younger than Will. He told me about his amazing wife Lisa. Allen connected with Ryan - Allen was a former tight end. We'd talk about football and how things were going with the Bills - he'd encourage me to continue to encourage Ryan. I still appreciate that - we didn't have too many sports writers in Buffalo who gave a damn about a third-string tight end who busted his butt every weekend on that field. Allen cared. I'd see him after all the games and he was just an awesome guy. Always happy - always pleasant.

He was diagnosed with leukemia a while back - I was so sad to hear the news but was sure that Allen (of all people) would beat it. He did for a while. We saw him at the NFLPA party during Super Bowl week here in Dallas this year - he looked good. It was great seeing an old friend.

I was devastated to read his wife's Facebook update on Thursday that he was not doing well. He was in ICU. His organs were shutting down. The doctors told her there wasn't anything else she could do. Lisa admitted that there is only so much the body can take. Allen passed away today. He was 49.

Allen Wilson was blessed with all of the underrated "soft skills" that make a successful journalist.

He was a great listener. He was sincerely curious about everyone. He made people see that he was genuinely interested in whatever they had to say. He rarely turned the focus of the conversation on himself. He had to earn everything he got in life, so he wasn't judgmental with the people he interviewed. He empathized with people across all social boundaries.

All those qualities made Wilson an award-winning sports writer and columnist for The Buffalo News. Wilson died Saturday at age 49 after a battle with leukemia at Roswell Park Cancer Institute.

Wilson worked for The News for the past 20 years and was a Buffalo Bills beat writer since 1999.

He was widely respected among journalists and by the teams he covered for his astute knowledge of sports and for his commitment to fairness and accuracy.

"He's one of the finest individuals I've ever met," said Steve Jones, retired Buffalo News executive sports editor. "He was a great reporter in terms of his work ethic, his sincerity and his involvement with the subject he was writing about. He always really enjoyed throwing himself into the subject. He never treated any story or any interview subject like it was routine."

Wilson was honored five times in the past decade alone by the New York State Associated Press Association for both sports reporting and column writing. He won the AP's distinguished sports reporting award in 2007 for a two-part series he wrote on former prep basketball star Ritchie Campbell. (Part One | Part Two)

Wilson's positive nature and unassuming style endeared himself to those he covered and gave him an uncommon knack for building trust with athletes and coaches.

"He made you feel very comfortable," said News sports writer Rodney McKissic. "I knew him for 22 years, and whenever I was feeling kinda down about anything, he would always make me feel better. That's just the kind of person he was.

"He was like a chameleon. He could hang out on the East Side or hang out in Williamsville and be right at home anywhere. He could get along with anybody."

"I know this is a cliche," said Joe Major, a friend and radio colleague of Wilson's, "but I have not met one person that had some dealing with Al who didn't come away genuinely liking the guy. That's the toughest part."

Born in Durham, N.C., Wilson was an avid sports fan his entire life. He was an all-conference outside linebacker in high school. One of the highlights of his senior year was getting the chance to work out a few days with then-college star Lawrence Taylor, who went on to a Hall-of-Fame career in the NFL. Wilson played tight end for two years at North Carolina Central University before a knee injury ended his football career. In his senior year at NC-Central, he was a member of the school's NCAA Division II national championship basketball team. One of his athletic claims to fame was playing a pickup basketball game with NBA great Michael Jordan.

His favorite teams growing up were the Dallas Cowboys, New York Yankees and the University of Notre Dame, and he remained loyal to them throughout his life.

"I used to give him grief for being a front-runner," Jones said. "I'd say, 'Al, I don't get it. The Cowboys, the Yankees and Notre Dame? Isn't there an underdog team in your life you're rooting for?' "

Wilson had a lifelong passion for writing. Upon graduating from college, he worked for the Durham (N.C.) Morning Herald. He moved to the Rochester (N.Y.) Times-Union and then the Orlando (Fla.) Sentinel before joining The News.

It was early in his News career that he met his wife, Lisa, who now is executive sports editor at The News.

Wilson worked the high school sports and college sports beats for The News and covered numerous NCAA Final Four basketball championships. In 2006, he and News reporter Keith McShea won a New York Newspaper Publishers first-place award for a series on the scarcity of African-American coaches in area schools. He has covered numerous Super Bowls over the past decade.

"When he was covering high schools, he almost had a big-brother type attitude toward the kids he dealt with," Jones said.

Wilson took pride in having a vote for college football's Heisman Trophy the last 15 years and followed the college game intensely.

"He loved evaluating," Jones said. "His business wasn't college football in the big sense. He covered the Bills, and he had to be familiar with the college games. But he had every cable package possible and watched a lot of games every week of the college season. For our draft preview, he'd be giving us 18 players deep on special teamers. I'd tell him, 'Al we're not going to run more than five of these guys. We don't need the eighth-ranked long-snapper.' "

Wilson was a founding member of the Buffalo Association of Black Journalists and a former vice president of the group. He also participated in the chapter's "YGB" news radio show targeted at "young, gifted and black" high school students, once taking a group of student journalists to Buffalo Bills training camp and arranging for them to interview coaches and players for a story. He also helped the high school journalists put together a live call-in show with himself and other professional sports reporters to discuss the team's prospects.

He was one of the hosts, along with McKissic and Major, of a radio show, the Sports Insiders, that ran for the past decade on Buffalo airwaves.

Besides his wife, Wilson is survived by a daughter, Alissa, two brothers, Jimmy and John, both of North Carolina, two sisters, Sharon Smith and Gwen Crutchfield, both of North Carolina, and his father, John Sr.

Funeral arrangements are pending.

I'm editing to add this...

I just went back and searched my Facebook messages - Allen and I corresponded back on November 13th. I told him I was glad his sister was a bone marrow match. He said it was truly a blessing since there was only a 25% chance of finding a match. Then he added, "As always thanks for the thoughts and prayers -- they really work." Sigh... no words...

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It has been such an emotional week dealing with a trifecta of very difficult losses. Good people, all with loving families, who will truly, truly be missed. Please pray for their families during this difficult time.

"Weeping may endure for the night, but joy comes in the morning." Psalm 30:5

My Mini Me

2011-11-30T23:11:00.002-05:00

Can you see a resemblance???

Reunion

2011-11-16T01:53:00.006-05:00

Ryan and I had the opportunity to attend the Cowboys vs. Bills game at Cowboys Stadium on Sunday - thanks to Melani and Rocket Ismail hooking us up with tickets, VIP passes to the owner's club, etc. We tailgated a bit with good friends Erin McBriar and Britt Pigrenet. After the game, our old friend Paul Lancaster got us family passes so we could catch up with some of Ryan's old teammates. I especially enjoyed seeing the training staff - we all got to know each other pretty well over injuries and rehab.

We miss our Buffalo peeps - looking forward to heading up there next year for a game.

A neat thing happened during this game I'd be remiss to address. David Nelson, who I had the chance to meet at a Garth Brooks Teammates for Kids event, scored a touchdown during the game, then proceeded to run what looked to be a lap around the field. He was actually taking the ball to his Dallas Cowboy cheerleader. He gave her a big ol' hug and handed her the ball. It was very sweet.

Team Will - DFW Walk Now for Autism Speaks

2011-11-13T01:35:00.003-05:00

Will and I trekked over to Grand Prairie today for the DFW Walk Now for Autism Awareness. Thanks to the help of several supporters, Team Will raised $275! After seeing all of the people out at the walk today, I am inspired to step up and do more next year. Team Will will be a team - and I'm going to set a fundraising goal of $1,000!

We've come such a long way in our autism battle. I remember the days when Will would hardly make any eye contact. He'd barely say a word. He kept to himself and seemed to be oblivious to life around him. Today, we were walking out of the Air Hogs stadium and Will said, "There's Shawn." Sure enough, he recognized one of his classmates from school. Moments like this give me hope, and hope is what keeps me going!

Thanks again to all of those who supported Team Will!

Front House Management's Celebrity Fashion Experience Vol. III

2011-11-10T01:20:00.004-05:00

I had the distinct pleasure of hosting the Celebrity Fashion Experience last week. I attended the event in the spring as a guest and had a blast. I was thrilled (and nervous) to host the event this time around.

The roster of designers was impressive. Nicholas D'Aurizio from Project Runway (sidenote: I totally forgot the name of the show and had a total brain fart in front of a couple hundred people) was the first collection to hit the catwalk. The designs were amazing! Next, sleek men's designs from J. Cheikh. The designer collaborated with superstar Mike Ruiz on the collection - it was wonderful. And the show stopper that night - Mr. Reco Chapple. Reco started his show off with scantily clad male models rockin' itty bitty swimsuits. The ladies in the crowd were very pleased. Then the ladies hit the runway in amazing designs. One gown took my breathe away!

Thanks to QC Cong for taking such amazing pics!

Challenge Air

2011-11-09T01:48:00.004-05:00

A while back, I met some wonderful people from an organization called Challenge Air. Challenge Air provides an amazing experience for children with special needs. Their Mission Statement says it all:

Mission Statement

Challenge Air builds self-esteem and confidence of children and youth with specials needs, through the experience of flight.

Since 1993, Challenge Air has enriched the lives of children and youth with special needs through its unique aviation programs. Challenge Air’s mission reflects the life-changing impact the flight experience has on children, families, donors, sponsors and communities as a whole.

With a network of nearly 3,500 volunteers nationwide, volunteers serve as pilots, ground crew, fundraisers, planning committee members and in numerous other capacities. As Challenge Air continues to grow and add more programs across the country, its mission will remain true..... To continue to provide a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to special needs children and youth through the gift of flight.
A couple weeks ago, Will was fortunate enough to participate in Fly Day here in Dallas. Will had a blast - what a neat and amazing experience.

www.challengeair.com

Happy Halloween

2011-11-01T22:15:00.005-05:00

Our little bride and army ranger had a blast trick-or-treating! We had picture perfect weather in Texas for the festivities.

Heels 2 Heal Gala

2011-11-01T21:48:00.005-05:00

I know it's been a bit since I last posted, but I've been sick as a dog! I left work early last week on Thursday - I felt a sinus headache coming on and that terrible itch in the back of the throat that means a cold is coming. By Friday, I was laid out in the bed. My head ached, I sneezed constantly. It was pretty awful and I ended up cancelling a bunch of plans - work, two auditions and an afternoon CLE. I laid in the bed all day Saturday because I had to build up some strength to host the Heels 2 Heal Gala benefiting the Women Called Moses organization. www.womencalledmoses.org The event raised funds to promote domestic violence awareness and services.

I wish I could say that I'm one of the lucky ones who has never had to deal with domestic violence. Unfortunately, my mother was in an abusive relationship for several years and I can tell you that I was deeply affected by that. Having been touched by domestic violence, I felt honored to be hosting this event surrounded by people who want to help.

A bonus of the night - my Football Wives castmate Melani Ismail and her husband Rocket were at the event. It's always fun hanging with good friends.

Today's inspiration

2011-10-22T21:18:00.002-05:00

Pumpkin Patch 2011

2011-10-22T20:49:00.009-05:00

We made the annual trek to the Flower Mound Pumpkin Patch a couple weeks ago. Last year, we waited until right before Halloween and ended up at the pumpkin patch on a very busy weekend. We swore we weren't doing that again. It was nice to get out there on a beautiful Texas fall day and let the kids run loose!

The kids both enjoyed the bounce houses...

Then, Will mastered the uber-complicated hay maze after his first go-thru. That's autism for you!

We made the kids pose for their pumpkin patch pic - as soon as we were done, the kids went back to playing...

Then it was back to running the pumpkin patch...

Going Beyond the Game...

2011-10-19T01:17:00.003-05:00

My Football Wives castmate Chanita Foster has a charity called Beyond the Game. Through fundraising efforts, Chanita and her crew take supplies to Africa and help build schools. A charity fundraiser was featured on Football Wives - I was so honored to be a part of the evening. I had even more fun when I flew to Atlanta
recently to attend one of her fundraising events.

Make sure you find out more about Beyond the Game - www.beyondtgame.com

Another highlight of the trip was staying with good friends from Buffalo - Raneisha and Peerless Price. It's always fun to see the folks you've maintained relationships with over the years. It's hard to do because of the constant moving around. But we're blessed to still have these two in our lives.

Today's inspiration

2011-10-18T12:30:00.000-05:00

November Lily

2011-10-16T20:39:00.003-05:00

Who doesn't love getting dressed up as a bride (or even a bride to be)?!?!? I loved being about to put my wedding dress on for a second time while shooting Football Wives. Putting on a gorgeous gown just makes me feel like a princess.

I had the opportunity to do a shoot for November Lily today. The company will launch next month. It's a luxury boutique bridal styling and design atelier. Owner Lulu Amin knows what she's doing. Here's a sneak peek pic from someone's cellphone today - I can't wait to see that shots, all of which were inspired by my favorite movie "Love Actually."

November Lily
Some Sweet Photography
TaKiyah Wallace, Lulu Amin and Stacy C. Uzuh.

Sunday inspiration

2011-10-16T20:37:00.002-05:00

Today's inspiration

2011-10-15T09:19:00.002-05:00

Today's Inspiration

2011-10-14T08:17:00.000-05:00

Supermodel WORK!

2011-10-13T14:56:00.003-05:00

How lucky am I?!? I get to model a couture creation at the Cocktails & Couture Fashion Fling and Trunk Show benefiting Easter Seals - they provide services and support for people with disabilities and other special needs. Cocktails and couture while raising money for an incredible cause - it doesn't get much better than that!

Today's Inspiration...

2011-10-13T12:32:00.002-05:00

Heals 2 Heel Charity Gala

2011-10-13T12:01:00.002-05:00

I'll be hosting the inaugural Heals 2 Heel Charity Gala benefiting the Women Called Moses Coalition & Outreach. The organization promotes domestic violence prevention and awareness. You can find out more at www.womencalledmoses.org. Hope to see you there!

Today's Inspiration

2011-10-12T10:48:00.001-05:00

Look who got his cast off today...

2011-10-11T19:06:00.003-05:00

Will promptly said, "That feels much better." Hopefully it'll be a while before we have to rush back to the ER or urgent care with a suspected broken bone.

Dallas Gospel Connection Feature

2011-10-06T20:50:00.003-05:00

Check out this feature written by Reggie Lewis. No, I'm not 32 - I just look like it! :)

Dawn Belcher Neufeld: More Than Just a Football Wife
By Reggie Lewis

Photo by Chris Blumenshine

Dawn Belcher Neufeld wants you to know that she is more than just a pretty face. While you may recognize her from VH 1‘s reality show, “Football Wives,” Neufeld, 32, is also a practicing attorney, philanthropist and mother of two wonderful children. During her spare time, Neufeld finds time to participate in her favorite charities--Off the Field and Garth Brooks Teammates for Kids Foundation.

Her husband, tight end Ryan Neufeld, is a seven-year veteran of the Dallas Cowboys, Buffalo Bills and Jacksonville Jaguars. This God-fearing couple met as undergrads at UCLA, where they became college sweethearts. After earning her law degree from the UC Davis School of Law, Dawn passed the California State Bar Exam on the first try. She practiced law in Los Angeles for one year before moving to New York to be with Ryan, who was playing for the Buffalo Bills.

In an email interview with “The Sports Zone,” Neufeld discusses life as a “football wife,” caring for a child with special needs, and her unwavering faith in God.

TSZ: What is it really like being the wife of a professional football player?

Dawn: Being a football wife is exciting! Going to games on Sundays, hearing thousands of people cheering for the team knowing your husband is out on the field – I think wives get our own adrenaline rush during games, especially if we’re actually fans (not all wives are). We are presented with opportunities to do so many wonderful things, from going to great parties and events to giving back to the community. Being a football wife definitely has its advantages.

But life as a football wife isn’t all glitz and glam. I remember earlier in Ryan’s career, I worried constantly about him getting cut. After he’d get cut, I’d worry about him getting another opportunity to play. You learn the politics behind football, and it can really destroy your love for the game. As Ryan’s career progressed and he got older and the injuries started tallying up, I found I enjoyed the game less and spent a lot of time worrying about him getting hurt. Ryan was on the field when his teammate Kevin Everett was almost paralyzed back in 2007. That was a huge wake up call for me - being a football wife became even more stressful after that. For the fans, it’s just a game. Some only care about the next win or how their fantasy football team is doing. Football stopped being a game a long time ago for us - we’ll deal with the costs associated with the game for the rest of our lives.

TSZ: If you had the opportunity to change one thing about your life as a football wife, what would it be?

Dawn: I’d live in the moment a little more. Ryan wasn’t drafted and he was always the guy who had to work a little harder just to make sure he had a job every week, so I spent a lot of time worrying about the “what ifs” instead of living in the moment.

TSZ: You are an attorney, TV personality, wife and mom…how do you find time to do it all?

Dawn: I have a supportive husband! I wouldn’t be able to accomplish any of this without Ryan. And I have to prioritize – I am tired A LOT! You won’t see me out at the club every weekend – I need my beauty sleep!

TSZ: As one of the stars of VH1’s “Football Wives,” you tried to display an elegance that women (and men) could be proud of. Did the writers ever try to get you to play a certain type of “character” that went against your beliefs?

Dawn: Were we watching the same show??? I hated how I was portrayed. I think I came across as being jealous and spiteful. Anyone who knows me knows the opposite is true. I always tell people that I can take responsibility for what they saw on the show (my cussing, for example) – it had to happen if it was captured on tape. What I can’t take responsibility for is the editing. It’s amazing how the powers-that-be can piece together and edit someone’s “reality.” What was portrayed on the show wasn’t necessarily my reality.

I can look back at the experience though and be proud of myself for standing up to someone who is used to bossing people around and treating people a certain way because she married well. Regardless of how that came across on television, I will never, ever regret calling a spade a spade and speaking my mind.

TSZ: Will we see any new episodes of “Football Wives” this season?

Dawn: VH1 has chosen not to renew the show – that was disappointing at first. We were very hopeful about a second season and what was in store for the viewers. The history-making NFL lockout took place, we had the debacle that was Super Bowl in Dallas, one of our cast members had a baby, Mat McBriar went to the Pro Bowl - so many awesome things happened in our lives that I think the viewers would’ve connected with. After watching some of the shows being featured on VH1, I realized they weren’t concerned about our reality at all.

We were told the show wasn’t being renewed because we were too boring and that viewers didn’t connect with Dallas. That’s funny to me – there are no fewer than three reality shows on big networks featuring Dallas right now. Shaunie O’Neal, who was an executive producer on our show, even called us “churchy.” There was no weave-pullin’, drag out fighting on “Football Wives.” If that made us churchy, I’m okay with that. I’m a mom, a wife, a professional – reality TV is not worth me compromising any of those things.

TSZ: Talk about the transition from professional football family to a life without pro football.

Dawn: It is so hard. No one can ever be prepared for that transition. People can tell you about it, they can try to help you prepare for it, but until you’re in it, it’s really hard to know what it’s like. We’re just lucky we made it through with our marriage intact. Many couples aren’t that lucky. The financial, mental and societal reality of the transition can really take its toll.

TSZ: Your handsome son Will was born with autism. Talk about the challenges you and Ryan have experienced as parents and as a family?

Dawn: Will developed normally as an infant and started presenting some developmental delays shortly after he turned one (and after a round of vaccines – but we won’t go into that, too controversial). I had him evaluated when he was around 18 months old, and by 19 months he was in all kinds of therapy.

It has been very difficult. I never took Will to football games because the stadium was always too loud – he was very sensitive to sound. Autism can be very isolating because you never know what might set your kid off, and because he doesn’t look sick, people may not realize he has a disability. We always get “the stare.” You know, the side-eye people give you when your kid is throwing a tantrum or acting up. The constant judgment is exhausting. And I think about how difficult it must be for Ryan – having a son and knowing that he will probably never follow in his footsteps. That has to be tough. But we’ve learned that when you have a kid with a disability, you really have to go with the flow and learn to appreciate the small things.

TSZ: How has Will’s condition helped you grow as a mother and woman?

Dawn: My motto in life is simple – “perspective.” Things can always be worse. When I’m having difficulties with Will, I let myself have an “autism mommy moment,” then I wipe away the tears and keep it moving. That’s pretty much how I function in life – when things get tough, let yourself have a moment, then get it together and keep going.

TSZ: Does religion play a major part in your life? If so, how has your faith sustained you?

Dawn: Absolutely. I’m a Christian and rely on my faith heavily to get me through the day. My worship playlist is always nearby when I need some inspiration. I believe my relationship with Christ is a personal one though, and I don’t wear it on my sleeve like other people I know.

In a pre-game family Bible study in Buffalo, former Bills’ quarterback Frank Reich, who orchestrated one of the greatest comebacks in NFL history, said “As Christians, we are either in a storm, just got out of one, or one is on the way.” That truly resonated with me. So I try to stay prayed up and prepared for whatever God’s plans are for me. I read Linda Dillow’s “Calm My Anxious Heart” years ago. The team chaplain’s wife recommended it to me. It changed my life. Worry and stress are probably my biggest foes, and I’m always able to find peace when I let go and let God.

TSZ: What are your future plans?

Dawn: Honestly, I’m not sure. My bucket list keeps getting longer, so maybe it’s time I start tackling some of those dreams. In the meantime, I hope to continue to try to live in the moment and continue to pay forward the opportunities and blessings we’ve received.

Neufeld always has special projects going on. On October 29, she will host the first annual Heels 2 Heal Awareness Gala fundraiser for Women Called Moses Coalition & Outreach (WCM), a Dallas-based non-profit organization that provides secure shelter and support services to battered women and their children.

For details on Dawn’s upcoming appearances and events, follow her on Twitter @DawnNeufeld or on Facebook.

http://dallasgospelconnection.com/sports-zone.html

The Gridiron Goddess has been busy!!!!

2011-10-05T20:59:00.007-05:00

Ooo wee - life happens! And it sure has kept me busy. Broken bones, trials, birthday parties - time to take a minute to BREATHE! And catch everyone up on my goings on!

First - Will's broken wrist:

Good news is that it wasn't that bad of a break. In fact, it was a buckle fracture. Little man will be in a cast until next week and he'll be good to go!

Bryn got her first mani and pedi! She absolutely loved it and keeps asking when we can go get more sparkle on our toes...

We celebrated Will's 7th birthday last month on the 23rd! That weekend, we had an Angry Birds cake at the house complete with a custom cake designed by the Cake Diva herself!!! Will absolutely loved it and the cake was fabulous!

I got to hang with some fabulous friends recently at the Celebrity Waiters Lunch benefiting Family Gateway! Lots of real life Football Wives were in attendance, including my co-starts Amanda Davis and Erin McBriar. No joke - this was one of the best fundraising events I've ever attended. There was so much fun and laughter while raising money for such an amazing cause. Special shout out to my buddy Jessice Colombo for the invite!

A highlight of the event??? Pledging $50 to have an officer serving as one of the celebrity waiters "arrest" Amanda!

The following evening, we were invited to another event by Mrs. Colombo - the SPCA Fur Ball! Good times were had by all and everybody looked FABULOUS!!!!!

More updates to follow!

In the meantime - RIP to Steve Jobs...

First Broken Bone

2011-09-17T22:31:00.002-05:00

Will's always been a daredevil, and I've always figured broken bones would in our future.

I watched Will climb on a small table and jump. No problem. I told him to stop. He gets back on the chair and attempts to stand on the back of the chair. BIG MISTAKE! He was on the ground and instantly grabbed his wrist. I found an urgent care nearby - they did xrays and found a compression fracture in his radius bone (is that what it's called)). Anyway, we are on the hunt for a pediatric orthopedist Monday.

Where's my Oscar???

2011-09-14T23:55:00.002-05:00

I've been at this acting game for years now. In a market like Dallas, it's hard to become a superstar. Pilots come through - some local actors are lucky enough to be booked in day roles. They shoot their short scenes and are forgotten. Some local actors are lucky enough to work on the plethora of commercial work we get around her. It pays the bills, but certainly won't make anyone famous for being anything other than the Taco Cabana guy. We get scripts, audition, and hope we showed enough to get a chance to do what we love - act.

I had my first audition in weeks this morning. I hadn't looked at the script until late last night, and I quickly realized it was a doozy. Three scenes - one requiring some hardcore emotion, the next a portrayal of a beligerent drunk, and in the final scene... tears. I'm a crier - I cry all the time. During Hallmark commercials, hearing the choir sing a favorite song at church - I lose it. But I've always had a problem with turning on the waterworks during an audition. It's something that has challenged me. Well, it hollared "Cha-lunge" once again today as I prepared to try to bring it.

My first two scenes went okay. You know, I'm a happy drunk when I've had just a little too much to drink. The drunk I needed to play was sad. That was hard for me - out of my zone. So it could've looked ridiculous.

But the last scene... oh, the last scene. I felt the tears welling up. Next thing you know I look up towards the reader with tears strolling down my checks. Raw, authentic emotion. I was so proud of myself - it's taken me years to get to that point. Now I'm ready for my next crying audition!

Another first!

2011-08-25T22:00:00.003-05:00

I took Bryn to her first gymnastics class this week - I mean, it's what we do in the suburbs, right? We sign our kids up for lots of activities because that's what we're supposed to do! Well, good thing she absolutely loved it! I watched Bryn follow instructions, bust somersaults and hang onto the rings like she'd done it before! We've got to work on her cartwheels though. I had to chuckle - she was smiling and having a grand ol' time while doing ab work. If she only knew...

Will's first day of school!

2011-08-22T18:56:00.004-05:00

Today was Will's first day of school! He's splitting time again this year between his SLC class and a regular 1st grade class. He's at a new school, but we're very excited several of his teachers from last year transferred to the new school as well. We also saw some familiar faces in Will's classes, including a kiddo he played Blast Ball with several years ago!

It is stupid hot in Texas!!!

2011-08-22T18:24:00.009-05:00

Do you know what 50+ days of 100+ degrees feels like??? It's been miserable, I mean MISERABLE, here in Dallas this summer with our record-breaking temperatures. I actually noticed this morning my skin is looking a little pasty - sort of like it does during the winter when we're stuck inside because it's too cold! It's been way too hot to enjoy the outdoors. But life goes on...

As much as I would've loved to stay indoors this weekend, I had a couple of "must-not-miss" events to attend! First and foremost, my Football Wives castmate Brittany Pigrenet is weeks away from giving birth to her first baby - a boy she and David are naming Bryson! Castmate Erin McBriar hosted an adorable shower for Britt Britt - can't wait to meet baby Bryson soon!

It was fun catching up with Britt and Erin - crazy to think this time last year we were in full-on Football Wives filming mode! The shower was nice - sounds like Erin is getting ready to embark on a little event planning and blogging - stay tuned!

I had to leave the shower earlier than I would've liked to race off to the most crowded mall in Dallas during tax-free weekend - Northpark Mall - so I could check something off of my bucket list - A FLASH MOB! I've wanted to do a flash mob forever, and when my good friend Heather Rodriguez announced plans to promote cancer awareness through one of the spontaneous routines, I was in!

We busted out our routine to LMFAO's Party Rock Anthem. We were almost halfway through the routine when the music messed up, so we had to start over. We were almost halfway through the second time when a police officer shut off the music. Party pooper (but I completely understand in light of the recent negative flash mob crime sprees). Anyway, it was a blast - so excited to have been a part of this amazing group that acted a fool in the middle of a crowded mall to help promote cancer awareness. Please check out www.cancerhascancer.org for more information about Heather Rodriguez and her courageous fight against ovarian cancer! There's also video of the flash mob!

Party pooper...

Friday after fun...

2011-08-05T20:49:00.003-05:00

This is how Football Wives play dress up with the little ones - princess dresses and football helmets!

The helmet was so heavy she literally couldn't move! No wonder Ryan's neck is all jacked up!

Bryn's first day of school 2011

2011-08-03T21:21:00.002-05:00

Little mama started her fall semester today (much to her daddy's delight - she's been wearing poor Ryan out this summer). Check out baby girl's swag - she's working those supermodel poses!

Smart Girls Rock!!!

2011-08-01T22:08:00.002-05:00

A while back, my profile was featured on my law school's website. I spoke with the writer Joe Martin several times over a period of a couple of months, so I was excited to read what he'd written. I was pleased with the write up - it focuses on all of the facets of my life - not just Football Wives. I really did have a wonderful experience in law school and credit the training and support I received at King Hall School of Law for my passing two bar exams (first try both times)!

I received an email from the marketing director at the law school today - UC Davis (the campus, not the law school) posted a link to my profile on its Facebook page yesterday. Apparently the link broke the Davis Facebook page record for "clickthroughs" - I'm not sure how many there were, but I think that's kind of cool.

Anyway, here is the profile - thanks to Joe Martin for an excellent write-up!

Dawn Belcher-Neufeld
Class of 2002

“I wasn’t your typical law student,” said Dawn Belcher-Neufeld ’02, “but I’m someone who can serve as an example to show that you can go to law school and still have a full and balanced life. I think King Hall allowed me to just be me, and I am who I am today because of it.”

Belcher-Neufeld, who was Law Students Association president while at King Hall and has passed the bar in both California and Texas, practices corporate law and estate planning with a small firm in Dallas. She is also a model, an actress whose marriage to former professional football player Ryan Neufeld led to a starring role in the VH1 reality show Football Wives, as well as an active volunteer for charity organizations including Off the Field and Garth Brooks Teammates for Kids.

“I loved everything about the Law School: its small size, the amazing faculty, the way that the dean and the professors always had an open door.” A native of Los Angeles, Belcher-Neufeld came to Davis from UCLA, where she had majored in Communications Studies and dabbled in modeling and acting. She and Ryan were engaged at the time, and she spent her first year at King Hall planning their wedding while adjusting to the academic challenges of law school while he was in Florida playing for the Jacksonville Jaguars.

“It wasn’t easy, and I did have a few Legally Blonde moments trying to come up with answers in class,” she said. “But by my final year, I was LSA president and giving the ‘welcome’ speech to incoming students, and I referenced Legally Blonde, so I kind of came full circle.”

Belcher-Neufeld said she “can’t say enough good things about King Hall” and how the Davis community and Law School helped her to meet the challenges. “Davis is the perfect town to be attending law school in—small enough so that you’re not caught up in the hustle and bustle of a big city or spending time stuck in traffic, but close to Sacramento and the Bay Area if you need to get away.

After law school, Belcher-Neufeld passed the bar in California and practiced with a firm in Los Angeles until 2003, when she moved to New York while her husband played with the Buffalo Bills. She put her career on hold to have two children, and after the family moved to Dallas in 2009 she passed the bar in Texas and resumed legal practice. She still does some modeling and acting, though “it’s not a priority,” she said.

Belcher-Neufeld said she got involved in the Football Wives program because she wanted audiences to see “what life is really like beyond the glitz and glamour of what people imagine professional football players’ lives are like.” Short careers, financial struggles, and lasting injuries are all-too-common, she said, although the program focused more on interpersonal conflicts. “Drama is what sells, so they focus on the drama,” she said.

Belcher-Neufeld continues to juggle acting and modeling offers and the demands of motherhood—including the responsibilities of caring for an autistic child—as she works to resume her legal career. She remains thankful to UC Davis School of Law for providing her with not only a first-rate legal education but also a growth experience that has helped her cope with the wide range of challenges she faces.

“I’m so much of a richer person because of what I experienced at King Hall,” she said. “The faculty is just unrivalled, and they know their students personally and really care about them. The students are supportive and help each other in every way they can. For me, this was the perfect place to study law.”

http://www.law.ucdavis.edu/profiles/Neufeld/index.html

Met an icon tonight!

2011-07-27T22:37:00.004-05:00

Earlier in the week, I received an invitation from my friend Tyler to attend a cocktail reception with burlesque icon Dita Von Teese. I have been a fan of hers for years and I jumped at the opportunity to attend.

Dita was stunning - I hate that I'm going to miss her show tomorrow night at the House of Blues. I'll have to catch her next time!

When is Football Wives coming back?!?

2011-07-26T20:31:00.015-05:00

If I had a nickel for every time I'm asked this question, I'd have a new pair of Louboutins sitting in my closet! It's a question that I'm asked frequently and it always pains me to say - "I don't think it is..."

This time last year, we were in full-on production mode for season 1 of the show. It was an exciting time and everyone was full of anticipation! One of the weekly entertainment magazines gave us 3 out of 4 stars - if I remember correctly, the previous season of Basketball Wives got half a star. We were going to do this! We spent four awesome (and sometimes grueling and emotional) months doing our best to tell our reality about what life is REALLY like for a football wife. Unfortunately, things didn't necessarily pan out as expected.

We (as a cast) realized a few weeks before the show premiered that something wasn't quite right. The network wasn't advertising the show. How was anyone going to watch if they didn't know we were coming on? I still see tweets every once in a while - people asking "there was a Football Wives?" Yep - it was such a short run that if you blinked, you might've missed it. Contrast that to several other Dallas-based reality shows on other networds right now - I hear and see them advertised all the time.

I remember driving to work one morning sitting in traffic on the tollway when I heard a commercial for Bret Michael's reality show on one of the biggest morning radio shows in the DFW area. It was airing on the same network that Football Wives was set to premiere. I thought - "Wait a minute - this is Dallas! The show happened here! We can't even get a commercial on local radio????" In short - NOPE! Most of the cast worked hard trying to promote the show on our own - we were setting up magazine and radio interviews, granting blogger interview requests - you name it, and incurring out-of-pocket costs to do so. We even set up our own red carpet premiere party only to have the network tell us we couldn't call it the "official" party.

We did our best, but in hindsight it's clear that the show wasn't going to be a success without the support of the network. It was as if we were being set up to fail.

The week before our premiere the network put the entire episode online. The day we premiered, the show came on earlier in the day so it didn't ACTUALLY premiere during our time slot. Why is this important??? Because ratings are EVERYTHING!!!! If a show gets poor ratings, then advertisers won't pay for ad space during the episode and the network doesn't make money. After not being promoted and having the first episode available before the actual "premiere," our ratings weren't as great as expected. Frankly, they were disappointing.

Then, a funny thing happened during our season one - our ratings started climbing after our slow start. Viewership steadily rose in the midst of some pretty big competition. Not only did we have to compete with Sunday night football every week since we aired during football season, but just about every big music awards came on during our time slot and we'd have to compete with those shows that had established national audiences - we're talking the Country Music Awards, the Bet Awards if I remember correctly. It seemed like there was ALWAYS something else on during our time slot. But our ratings kept rising. By the time our last episode aired, our viewership had risen to around 1.5 million viewers between the three showings of the episode on finale day. 1.5 million viewers. That's pretty good for a show that wasn't promoted. It's a lot more viewers than other VH1 shows had that have gotten renewed. We were pretty confident that there would be a season two.

I started having my doubts around Super Bowl - how could the biggest game in American football be played in our city, yet the cameras weren't rolling? I'd been told by the powers that be that IF we had another season, we wouldn't start shooting until around summertime. Summer? We did that during season one! Wouldn't it be nice to change things up a bit?

Anyway, Super Bowl Sunday rolled around - certainly the network would run a Football Wives marathon that day. They run everybody else's marathons, why not ours? Imagine my disappointment when I flipped to the network that day and they were running a Basketball Wives marathon - ON SUPER BOWL SUNDAY! I'm a smart chick - I think I knew back then we wouldn't be coming back when the network refused to do anything to promote the show. But I guess there is always hope...

We started hearing comparisons to Basketball Wives early on. Makes sense - we had the same executive producer, the same production company. It was a reality show about sports "wives." I can't blame people for making the comparisons. But the shows are different, for obvious reasons. Our cast is comprised of women who are actually WIVES! We had two castmembers who are not - just-the-girlfriend Brittany who is now expecting a baby boy with her Dallas Cowboys boyfriend David Buehler (you missed that - the pregnancy would've been featured on season 2 had there been one) and Mercedes Nelson (who dated a high profile now ex-Cowboy - if they had told her story right, she was incredibly relevant to the story we could've told). In contrast, most of the Basketball Wives are divorced or at some point had a relationship (or relationships - plural) with professional basketball players. Is it just me, or should being married be a requirement if you're on a show with "Wives" in the title???? And funny thing is - several of those ladies are dating football players. That's a bit ironic I think.

But here is one of the problems - we were actually married!!!! The women on our cast have husbands that we actually loved and care for, who have good reputations as being professionals and family men. Some of the guys are still active players, and if we had acted a complete fool on national t.v., it could've potentially affected our husbands' careers. Most of us are mothers, some of us with our own careers. Getting on t.v. and acting a complete fool was never, ever going to happen.

In contrast, Basketball Wives had it's highest ratings yet after last weekend's episode in which two of the castmembers got into a weave pullin', breast exposing fight that resulted in one of them being sued for assault. In the Football Wives episode where I threw the cookie at Pilar, I had the foresight to know that if I'd actually made contact with that cookie, there would've been police waiting for me at the dock. I played softball and I have great aim, and she wasn't sitting that far from me. I missed on purpose. I wasn't trying to catch a charge over that broad or the show - it just wasn't going to happen. But that (and the travesty that was the last episode) was all the fight drama the viewers were going to get.

People called our show boring, constantly comparing it to Basketball Wives. We didn't have to compete with each other - the only thing we really had in common was that "Wives" word in our show titles.

There are other notable differences between Football Wives and Basketball Wives. Basketball Wives was filming their second season while we were filming our first. It appeared to me that they had a bigger budget - more extravagant trips, etc. Their season would be ten, hour-long episodes. We had eight, twenty-two minute episodes to try to tell a story. Initially, we were going to get ten, twenty-two minute episodes but the network cancelled two shows due to low ratings early in the season. So with an abbreviated season, often times the story that was pieced together didn't make a lot of sense. Had the show been longer and the story told right, I think the show would've connected with more people.

And advertising. While our season was struggling, the Basketball Wives were being featured on the sides of buses and in commercials. I often wonder what we would've been able to accomplish had we be given the same consideration.

While watching season 2 of Basketball Wives, I noticed something else - the network wouldn't air some of the Basketball Wives episodes earlier in the day - that way, people would have to tune in to the show later in the evening. RATINGS. Or how about the night the Basketball Wives season finale was supposed to air at the same time as a big awards show. We didn't get our show moved around to avoid competition, but when the bball ladies had to go up against Oscars, you bet your ass they postponed the finale until the next week. RATINGS!

We didn't get a reunion. What reality show on VH1 doesn't get a reunion? That was the first red flag that we might be in trouble. Personally, my theory is the Football Wives reunion didn't happen for a couple of reasons. For one, I don't think Pilar would've been woman enough to show up. She would've been confronted hard. It was easy for her to talk smack during interviews when she, the producer and crew were the only ones in the room. Having seen the episodes and heard the derogatory things she was saying about the cast, she knew what was coming and I am certain she wouldn't have shown up for a reunion. She's the classy one remember? She won't engage... unless she's hiding behind twitter.

Secondly, had there been a reunion, you would've had the cast saying, "Okay, here's what really happened." See, producers want you to think that the story they tell is, in fact, reality. The reality is that everything you see on these shows had to happen, but it is edited and told according to what some genius has decided would make a good story. Having gone through the process of participating in reality t.v., when I watch shows like Basketball Wives and I'm gasping and holding my breath, I remind myself - Okay, what really happened??? That's what would've happened at a Football Wives reunion - our reality may have been exposed. We would've told the true story.

Shortly after our season wrapped, we got word that the Basketball Wives season 2 reunion was already being planned and coordinated. That was like a slap in the face. And it stung. We had put so much time and effort into the project that at the very least, I thought we deserved some closure.

I later heard a radio interview Shaunie O'Neal participated in. During the interview, she called our show "churchy" and certainly didn't sound supportive. She later denied she called us churchy but she did. I heard her say it. Just sayin', but I think there might be some sort of conflict of interest when the show's executive producer is not promoting the show and is in fact degrading it. But things are all good for Shaunie I guess since Basketball Wives is doing so well. She couldn't support the "competition." Crazy to think that she could have had two successful shows had we be given her support.

Football Wives is a good show. It's fun and endearing and entertaining. The guys are involved - it's interesting getting their perspective on things. I watch DVR'ed episodes every once in a while and it makes me wonder what dummy made the decision not to bring it back - it was a good show. I don't agree with a lot of the editing of Football Wives - actually, I think it was pretty whack. But it was a good show. We weren't fighting and cussin' all the time though. If that's all viewers want, they weren't getting it from this group of ladies.

During season 1, you saw a few snippets of what we did during that four months of shooting, but I promise you we didn't even scrape the surface of what it's like to be a football wife. You guys missed some good stuff too - there is probably enough tape to put together a reel of highlights that would be awesome. For example...

We got stuck on an elevator in New York - that was actually pretty scary, but funny as hell.

I think about the day I made a comment about Amanda's pussy (cat) being on my lap. The crew even started laughing and we had to stop taping for a couple of minutes to regroup.

I think about hanging out on the dock after the boat fight praying a slightly intoxicated Erin McBriar wouldn't fall into the water - she was the only one wearing a mic and they needed her to stand at attention to catch the post-Cookiegate discussions.

You missed the Football Wives out on the Hudson River in New York overlooking the sight of the World Trade Center and Chanita picking up the tour boat microphone to sing the Star Spangled Banner.

There are so many things you didn't get to see - good parts that would've made you laugh, made you cry. It is a shame you (and I) never got to see them.

So what did you miss that would've been season 2??? For starters, Super Bowl was in Dallas this year and it was a complete debacle because of the weather. Chanita flew into town ready to take the Big D by storm and she just had to be somewhere (vs. stuck inside in the cold). So we went to the mall - the only store open was Forever 21. So Ryan and George chilled while we scoured the empty mall before heading for a bite to eat at Cheesecake Factory. It was pretty entertaining.

And the real life football wives had a blast Super Bowl week - snow and all! That's us at the NFLPA's big bash.

We wrapped up the week with a Super Bowl party at Amanda's house - it was perfect!

As previously mentioned, David and Brittany are expecting a baby boy - and soon! We'll be holding a baby shower for her next month.

You missed Melani and I reconciling and laughing about a potential spoof with a castmember being portrayed by a tranny. Get 'em Quepha.

Deion is going to be inducted into the Pro-Football Hall of Fame. Um, kind of a big deal. Actually, you may not have seen that part because Pilar swears she wouldn't come back to the show and is doing her best to do distance herself from the show. Fine with me - bye!

And Mat McBriar made it to the Pro Bowl! We could've gone to Hawaii to support Erin and all stay in a house together for a week. You're telling me if they'd put us all under one roof for a week no drama would've popped of?!?!? I think there would've been plenty. It may not have been weave pulling or anything like that, but there was certain to be conflict, and because viewers like conflict, I'm thinking the ratings would've been pretty good.

Most importantly, we missed the opportunity as a show to be a part of history. The lockout was recently lifted and it was definitely material for season 2. The media is calling the lockout historical, and we could've been there to show the Football Wives version of it. But nope. No cameras anywhere.

And, there were no cameras rolling today either when castmate Amanda Davis found out her hubby Leonard was being cut by the Cowboys to free up cap space. The Davis family just drove back to town from Arizona last week - full of anticipation and ready to get back on the gridiron, only to realize and face the disappointment of the business side of football. If the story would've been told right, I promise it would've made for amazing t.v.

I shake my head thingking about the focus group the network reportedly put together after our show. Apparently focus group members who I'm assuming are from New York or Los Angeles said that Dallas was boring and that it didn't seem very interesting. Right... that's why there are no less than three reality shows based in Dallas on air right now. Boring my *ss!

So what now??? Well, we move on and continue our lives. The Neufelds are doing well - Ryan is officially retired and dealing with the post-retirement issues many players deal with. My husband is 35 and will most likely end up on disability. At 35! The kiddos are doing amazing and would've certainly provided some entertainment - Bryn's favorite word right now is "bubbies." She's become quite the character. And I continue to practice law - somehow viewers missed during season 1 that I do work! Hearing people tell me on Twitter to go get a job gets old.

So, we're still living life and appreciating the few opportunities Football Wives presented.

For those of you who watch Basketball Wives, you all know what NMFF means, right? Now that Evelyn Lozada is planning on marrying Chad Ochocinco, she's being hammered with questions about whether or not she would join Football Wives. She usually says something along the lines of "hell no" and says that Football Wives is a NMFF. Well, it can't be that much of a NMFF if she keeps having to address it. People are talking about it - it's relevant. People want the show back. And are we really a NMFF since we start airing this week down under in Mat McBriar's 'hood? HELLO AUSTRALIA! And do NMFFs end up on Centric TV, where season 1 of Football Wives will air in 2012? I think not. People watched the show, they want to know what happened to the show, and I think we should give them what they want. Fans, and my castmates, deserve something.

We did our best to fight to bring the show back but it's out of our hands. If you are interested in supporting the show and want to see another season, we have a Facebook page - "Bring Back Football Wives for a Season Two." Please feel free to like it. Harass VH1 - tell them to bring us back. You never know... it worked for T.O.!

*Disclaimer: I am not hating on Basketball Wives - I watch it every week and fully support a couple ladies on the show, even some of the more controversial ones. And I'm not bitter - I'm grateful for the opportunity to have been a part of this cast and experience. Just sharing my thoughts.

Meet Amanda!

2011-07-26T14:34:00.003-05:00

Hey everyone - I want to introduce you to my buddy Amanda Nall! Amanda is one of my real life football wife friends. Her husband Craig played with Ryan in Buffalo - we had lots of time to bond during those cold winters! Well, Craig and Amanda live about 20 minutes from us here in Texas. They are great friends and we always do what we can to support each other - check out my first ever "Guest Blog" segment on the Gridiron Goddess!

Introducing Amanda Nall!

Hello to all of the family, friends and FANS of Dawn's! My name is Amanda Nall and Dawn and I decided to do a little switch-a-roo and make guest appearances on each other's blogs today! I've always wanted to be a "guest blogger"! It sounds so official! ;)

This is me. :) Hi!

Here's a quick rundown on me. I'm a 29 year old stay-at-home mom/preschool teacher. I have been married for 6 years to a sweet man who just so happened to have played in the NFL (quarterback) for 7 years. Which is how I met Dawn. Our hubbies played together in Buffalo. :) I have 2 little boys-Matthew, 3, and Mason, 1. They are my joy, my heart, my soul...my purpose for being.

The fam.

AND, I am also a 31 Gifts Senior Consultant. Which is why I am here today, highjacking Dawn's blog. We are actually doing a little switch-a-roo. She will be the guest blogger on MY blog today as well talking about her business and its AMAZING skin care line!! So go HERE to check that out and support your girl! Don't forget to "follow" my blog while you're there if you like what you see! :)

So, onto the purpose of this intrusion.

Like I said, I am a 31 Gifts Consultant. If you haven't heard of 31, it is a direct selling company that produces some really adorable, affordable tote bags, handbags, organizational products to help clear your clutter, backpacks, lunch totes, etc etc etc... Best of all, almost everything can be personalized for just $7! You can choose from many different fonts, monogram styles, thread colors. At the very least, yall go check out the online catalog. Flip through a few pages and see what ya think!

These are a few of my favorite new things... (You should be able to click the pics to enlarge.)

Like anything you see?? There is tons more in the catalog! AND right now everything is 15% off!! Only until August 31! Ordering is very easy. You can can shop online anytime at www.mythirtyone.com/amandanall. Just click on "Place an Order". Orders will arrive at your door in 2 weeks or less. :)

And for those of you wondering about the Business Opportunity with 31...well let me just tell you straight out. I have tried a LOT of other direct selling companies. MonaVie, Arbonne, World Ventures to name a few. This is the only one that I ever made money at and didn't have to invest a ton of money into.

Enrollment Kit

For $99 you can become a consultant. And for that, you get over $300 in bags, totes, stationary and business materials (shown above) to get you well on your way! You also get your own website for free for the 3 months (you don't have to keep it after those 3 months if you don't want to but its only about $10 a month if you'd like to). Perks??? Well, lets see! How about a 25% commission on anything you sell starting immediately, a 25% consultant discount, and the fact that this stuff sells itself!?! When I first got my 25 catalogs that came with my enrollment kit in, I showed them to my neighbors, friends and family. And all of a sudden I had made my $99 back and then some. People WANTED to have parties to get free stuff as hostesses! And the parties around Christmas time were AMAZING because everyone wanted to do some shopping for all the women/girls on their lists!

For more info on becoming a consultant, go to my website and click on "Join My Team". Its that easy to get started! Personally, I joined to get that discount and the kit! And then people I knew wanted to know how they could order too. And pretty soon I was hooked and making actual MONEY! For awhile I thought all direct selling companies were scams b/c I had to invest a ton of money and then persuade my friends to PLEASE buy something!!! Not this stuff!! I love it!

I also have a 31 blog dedicated to all things 31. www.amandas31.blogspot.com I update it with monthly specials, party reviews, ideas on how to use different bags and lots of pictures! The consultant and hostess info needs to be updated on it because we have moved to a new catalog but it is right for the most part! I will be tweaking it soon!

So that's it ladies...(and gentlemen??). Thank you so much for reading and letting me barge in on your girl's blog! If you have any questions, you can reach me on my blog or at amandanall31(at)gmail(dot)com. Thanks again! :)

Bansela Site is Up!

2011-07-23T09:12:00.005-05:00

I had the privilege of working on a modeling project recently with Nan Holloway and her company - Bansela. This was one of the best photoshoots I've ever been on! The models were all styled by my good friend Denise Merlick - Denisa and I worked on The Bite together for almost two years. Check out the site! The jewelry is gorgeous!

www.bansela.com

I'm officially in my mid-30s!

2011-07-14T22:21:00.008-05:00

Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me! Can't believe I'm 35 years old. I wish I could say I'm not feeling it, but my knees hurt when I run and I've got bags under my eyes. Time is taking a toll! But I always say - another year is such a blessing - lots of folks I know didn't make it to their 35th birthdays. Perspective.

Speaking of perspective, when I finally get around to getting the tattoo I promised myself when I turned 35, it's going to say just that - perspective. Perspective has become my motto in recent years. It's amazing how keeping perspective can completely change your outlook on anything. For me, it helps me keep my stress and life in it's proper place - someone, somewhere is dealing with something way worse than me, so I'll deal. I'd like a permanent reminder that "perspective" is the word I use to help keep me sane these days.

Back to some fun stuff - after I got off of work yesterday, we met up with my friend Miesha and rode rollercoasters at Six Flags. Riding coasters is my favorite pastime - and even though it was over 100 degrees, I was ready to take on the park. Fortunately, it wasn't too crowded and the longest we had to wait to ride anything was about 15 minutes.

Miesha gave me the best birthday present ever - a ride on the Skydiver. It's half bungee jump, half sky dive. I've wanted to do this ever since I was a little kid running through the Six Flags in California. We got up in that harnass, did a little prayin' followed by a little cussin', but we made it. Good, good times. Couldn't have imagined a better way to spend my 35th birthday!

Buffalo Gals Reunite in Dallas

2011-07-14T22:07:00.003-05:00

I couldn't have imagined a better way to spend the eve of my 35th birthday than to spend some time with my Buffalo-chicks-who-now-live-in-Texas crew Amanda and Blake. Britney Spears was in town performing at the AAC, and since we all went to the concert last time she was here, we just had to go again.

The concert was good, but not as great as her Circus tour. We had more fun people watching - the gays and teenagers wearing tight clothes and wearing 10 inch pumps they can't walk in were in full force! We were definitely entertained.

D210 Covers the 2011 Reebok Heroes Celebrity Baseball Game

2011-07-14T21:39:00.006-05:00

On a super hot Texas summer afternoon, we braved the heat and skipped over to Dr. Pepper Ball Park to check out the Reebok Heroes Celebrity Baseball Game benefiting the Heroes Foundation and the Mike Modano Foundation. There were some heavy hitters from the sports and entertainment industries on the field. Actors Michael Clarke Duncan and Donald Faison were fan faves. Sports stars Akin Ayodele, Martellus Bennett and Bradie James also suited up for the game. The kids in attendance enjoyed the Frisco Roughriders mascot Deuce get his groove on.

The overall scene stealer that afternoon was the Mavs owner Mark Cuban. Mark hung with the fans taking pictures and signing autographs. He spoke in the crush of the media. Then when I caught him during a free moment, I asked if we could pull him aside for a couple of questions and HE SAID YES! I quickly collected myself and asked him about the charity benefiting from the day's festivities. We talked about the buzz from winning the championship game. When I referred to Mark as the owner of the championship Dallas Mavericks, Mark was like, "Say it again!" It was a very neat highlight and I will remember that moment for years to come. The championship trophy even made an appearance at the game!

The Heroes Foundation is a 501(c) Corporation that provides opportunities for talented kids from all walks of life to participate in a baseball and basketball programs preparing them for college and ultimately professional levels of competition. In addition, the Foundation is active in using sports as a way of providing both educational and cultural opportunities for youth in the region. The program has served more than 25,000 kids and has raised more than $4.5 Million since its inception in 2001. Check out www.heroesorganization.org for more information

Flashback

2011-07-09T20:14:00.004-05:00

Several weeks ago, I came across the cartoon Jem on t.v. Jem was one of my favorite cartoons growing up - my sisters and I watched it all the time. I had to crack up watching the episodes now - they sure do seem to focus on some pretty mature themes. Even crazier is that I still remember most of the songs sung by Jem and the Holograms and their rivals The Misfits. I was thrilled that Bryn seemed to like the cartoon - we've been bonding watching the old episodes.

Last night, Bryn grabbed the Guitar Hero "quitar" and sang the Jem theme song for 30 minutes. We decided to get it on video today - enjoy!

Teen & Jr. Teen United States-World Pageants

2011-07-05T22:41:00.014-05:00

I was so honored to have been asked by pageant guru Gaspar Cruz to judge the Teen & Jr. Teen United States-World pageants. We also judged the Miss United States Intercontinental pageant as, meaning that over three days of competition, we had to judge and narrow down the field of over 80 young women to just 3 queens (one in each division).

The pageant was in Houston so I made a roadtrip. It was my first time heading south on the 45 and I was kind of surprised by the size of Huntsville Prison. While stopping for a bite to each, I did some research. It's the prison that executions are conducted in Texas. One of the most notorious hostage situations occurred at that prison. The prisoners built the old electric chair referred to as "Old Sparky." And at the prison museum across the street, there is apparently a display of creative shanks made by inmates. Intriguing.

Back on the road, I arrived in Houston around 3 on Thursday and was immediately whisked away for makeup. The pageant started that evening with the preliminary competitions. We judged all of the contestants in evening gowns, the teen and Miss contestants in bathing suits and the juniors in casual wear. With all of the talent on the stage, we had an incredible task ahead of us.

"Us" - the judges. Let me introduce you to this group of awesome folks I got to spend the weekend with. We had so much fun and have created relationships that will last a lifetime.

HILARY CRUZ

This unbelievable young woman is breath-taking. She's got the Angelina Jolie thing down - stunningly beautiful. Well, Miss Hilary is the former Miss Teen USA 2007 and is currently pursuing an acting career in L.A. Nothing but good things are coming to Hil - she's a rockstar!

DIANE DENIGRIS

This former Mrs. World, Mrs. America and Mrs. Arizona is my hero! She is such an accomplished pageant scene and I'm totally looking forward to getting to know her better. I'm hoping to help her judge her local pageant in New York in the fall.

HILARIO HUFANA

A graduate of FIDM San Francisco, my new friend Hilario now works for Phyto and schooled all of us on our haircare. Thanks to him, I plan on having amazing luxurious locks in the near future. By the way, Hilario is skilled in Tahitian dance and he's also a figure model.

ANNIE ANSETH

Annie was my first co-judge I met - we got our makeup done together. I realized quickly that she is a stunning beauty queen - she's is the former Miss Montana USA 2010. This wonderful young lady is so excited - she's planning her wedding to a wonderful guy who proposed to her on stage when she was relinquishing her crown at the end of her reign. I watched the proposal on youtube - it is too sweet!

DEWAYNE ROSS

Dewayne is THE premiere wedding coordinator in the Houston area. We had so much fun looking at the amazing events he's planned on his iPad. I was floored. He's incredibly talented. And FUN! After we sat in interviews for 10 hours one day, Hilario, Dewayne and I walked to Grand Luxe for some dinner and bounded some more. Good times - I've got two new brothers and three new sisters in crime!

The first night's festivities included the preliminary competitions in gowns, casual wear for the juniors and swimsuits for the teens and misses. Our scores determined the cuts that would be made to determine who would move on in the competition. It was a fun night, and the judges looked good....

....but we knew the competition was going to be tough. We had our work cut out for us.

The following day, we spent hours upon hours, from 8am until 6pm judging the girls in interview. THe interviews were very important to me - it's an opportunity to see if these girls had a little more than just being pretty. Too my pleasant surprise, most of them did. One girl busted out a Carmen opera song for us - she was amazing. Two other young ladies told us they can sign with the mouthes closed - they demonstarted and were right. One negative that came up during interview - it because clear to us that bullying was on the minds of a lot of contestants. THey might be bullied for not being pretty enough. Or, they might be too pretty and polished, so then she's bullied for being too much of a pageant patty. One young lady even started crying - we went out of our way to make sure she knew she was loved and appreciated. Overall, the ladies were phenomenal and inspired me to step up my game.

Judgment day was on Saturday - we had to judge three separate competitions. We were thrilled to award Rylie Spicker of Florida as the new Jr. Teen United States World.

The Miss United States Intercontinental winner is Jessica Hartman from Colorado. This lovely lady is going to rock it at the international pageant. She was one of my faves from the beginning.

Then we had to decide the Teen United States-World winner. It was frustrating for me because I had my favorites - some of them didn't make the first cut down to 20, then the second cut down to 10, then the third cut down to 5. I really liked a young lady from Florida - Jasmine Avery. I think she presented herself so well on stage and was a contender. The other judges didn't feel as strongly as I did. I also thought two of the girls in the top five were stunningly beautiful - Miss Oklahoma and Miss Missouri. Both were stunning and belonged to be in the top 5, but they seemed to be missing something. Neither thanked the judges after being called for the top 5 - that mattered to some of us. In contrast, the two ladies that won and were first runner-up thanked up profusely. Our teen winne is Devin Gant from North Carolina. This young lady had it going on - she deserved to win the crown.

Congrats again to the winners and to all of the contestants who did a wonderful job. I leave you on a funny - as the top ten was being announced for teen, I quickly noticed that no blondes where being called. In fact, by the time all the contestants had been called, there were only brunettes and a red-head in the top 10. When does that ever happen???

I had fun - I hope they ask me back again to judge!

Night of Superstars 2011

2011-06-26T19:39:00.002-05:00

I've been on my share of red carpets - sometimes walking them as a "celebrity," sometimes conducting celebrity interviews. Last night's red carpet at the Night of Superstars has to be the most memorable yet! The event honorees are children - these superstars were given the all-star treatment - everything from makeovers to tuxedos and evening gowns. They even showed up in stretch SUV limos!

I was fortunate enough to escort a wonderful young man named Zach down the red carpet. Zach is the sweetest little guy - so handsome! He's 8 and told me he was going to be 9 soon - in December! I noticed Zach's walking stick right away so I knew he had sight issues. He couldn't really see the red carpet ahead of us - at one point he asked how many people were there because it looked like there were about 20 people waiting to greet our celebrities. I had to inform him that there were probably 200-300 people waiting for him on the red carpet! He was so excited and handled the red carpet like a pro! He posed for pictures and signed autographs - he rocked it like the superstar he is!

I'm always reminded at events like these how blessed we are and how amazing the spirits are of kiddos and their families dealing with special needs. The event was incredible and I look forward to participating in the future!

Teammates for Kids Trip - 2011

2011-06-26T19:28:00.005-05:00

Ryan and I have been involved with Garth Brooks' Teammates for Kids Foundation for years now. I can't say enough good things about the organization - they collect donations from professional athletes for children's charities. Those donations are triple matched, and 100% of that money goes directly to the charities. An added bonus - Garth hosts a charity weekend in Vegas! Mr. Brooks is performing at the Wynn, so that's where we stayed. We were treated to a performance by Garth and Trisha at the Encore theater. I highlight of my trip - I was asked to interview the Teammates on the red carpet! It was such a great weekend! Make sure you check out the foundation - www.teammatesforkids.org

Bottom's Up!

2011-06-15T13:14:00.002-05:00

I hope she got it all...

MAVS WIN!!!! MAVS WIN!!!

2011-06-14T19:52:00.006-05:00

It's almost 8 p.m. and I can't help but think that I should be sitting here watching game 7 of the NBA championship series between the Miami Heat and Dallas Mavericks. No need though - the hometown team brought home its first NBA championship after the Heat collapsed in game 6.

D210 covered the exit interviews today at the AAC. Coach Carlisle answered questions for about 30 minutes. One of the most notable things he said was that this team and all the guys on it have earned lifetime bragging rights because they won a championship. He said they are set for life!

One of the things I noticed about the guys was how "in the moment" everyone seemed to be - with a lockout looming and contracts up in the air, guys like Tyson Chandler and JJ Barea couldn't stop smiling. JJ talked about heading home to Puerto Rico, where you know he'll have his own parade (JJ for Presidente!). Someone asked Tyson what he was going to do to celebrate the win - he said he was going to set up a slip 'n slide in his front yard and go for a dive. Loved that! Even a usually stoic Dirk Nowitski couldn't stop grinning from ear to ear (and I noticed today he might be still suffering a bit from that cold he played with last week - he was still coughing and sneezing).

Jason Terry came down to interviews in a terry cloth robe and truly seemed be living in the moment. He was so excited because the team had just been informed that they'd all been invited to the Espy Awards next month!

An interesting note - Mark Cuban said he was contemplating not doing championship rings - he wanted to do something different, special. Well, the overall sentiment today from Coach Carlisle to The Jet and MVP Dirk is that they want their rings!

The parade will be held on Thursday in downtown Dallas - you know we'll be there! Check out for parade route and information. It's going to be hot - so come prepared!

Congrats again to the Dallas Mavs - 2011 NBA Champions!

To catch a predator...

2011-06-10T12:14:00.006-05:00

People who know me know I'm pretty unshakeable and fearless. My favorite pastime is riding rollercoasters - the faster, the better. I have skydiving on my bucket list. I rush in to help during dangerous situations while others run away. I'm rarely intimidated. I don't mince words and usually say how I feel. I face challenges head-on, using my skills to analyze tough situations and act accordingly. I'm not one to go run and hide when I feel threatened or intimidated. That was until the last couple of weeks.

As you know, I've been covering the Dallas Mavericks games for D210 for a while. There are familiar faces in the Mavs locker room - lots of local journalists we've gotten to know over the years. But the media atmosphere changed significantly during the playoffs - there were literally media outlets from all over the world covering the games, so lots of new and unfamiliar faces. I met a crew from France last night who were so cool. And on Wednesday, I attended a mixer for the National Association of Black Journalists that was fun. The media surrounding big sporting events is an experience in and of itself!

As an attorney and television personality, networking is part of my daily life. My business cards are always handy and I'm constantly trying to initiate business and/or make contacts in both industries. It's not uncommon to hear the words, "Let's grab a drink or lunch sometime." So when I gave a reporter from New York my business card the night the Mavs clenched the western conference championship against OKC, I didn't think much of it. I got the vibe that he was more interested in hitting on me than networking, but surely he'd taken notice of the big ol' wedding ring on my left hand that screams "TAKEN!" I learned long ago to trust my instincts and something about this guy raised caution flags immediately.

Tuesday morning after Memorial Day, I was sitting in my office when my telephone rang - it was him. I asked the secretary to put the call straight to voicemail. On the message, he explained he was in Miami and had some downtime in between assignments. He asked me to call him back at the hotel - he left the number and his room number. I didn't call him back.

Two days later, he called my job again. Persistent, I thought. This time, he didn't leave a message when I asked the secretary to put him into my voicemail. I figured I'd have to call him back or he'd keep calling me at work. That afternoon, I gave him a ring from my cell (dang it - now he has my cell number). The conversation went as expected - small talk at first. I asked how Miami was. He said it was great. He then asked me if we could spend some time together when he got back to Dallas - you know, grab a drink or something. Confused, I thought maybe he didn't get the memo that I'm married. So I purposefully mentioned my husband - my very big, manly, retired NFL tight end husband - and my kids. His response? He was married and had kids too. At this point, I'm thinking to myself, "Get off the phone. Get off the phone quick. Crap - he has my cell number." He told me he didn't mean to intrude. I told him to enjoy Miami.

The following evening, he called me from his hotel room. I didn't recognize the number, so I answered the phone. Crap - it was him. I was getting ready to leave to go to an event and was applying my makeup. He asked if he was on speakerphone and I explained I was getting ready to leave for an event. He said he'd let me go, but asked what time he could call me later. "Never," I thought. I told him I'd be on the road in a bit. When he called my cell at 7:25 that evening, I didn't answer and he left a message. He said we should get creative - maybe after my event, I could swing by his hotel and we could have a nightcap...

How did he know Ryan wasn't going to the event with me? How did he know I'd be near his hotel? I didn't call him back. Freaked out, I called a friend of mine who is married to a cop. I just wanted her to know what was up in case anything crazy happened to me. The following morning, I played the message for Ryan - this guy was really starting to freak me out and I wanted Ryan to be aware of what was going on.

I made my way down to the AAC for Game 3 of the championship series the following Sunday. I wasn't thinking about whether or not the Mavs would win. I couldn't focus enough to formulate my sound bites for D210. I was actually nervous about running into this guy. I knew it was inevitable - we'd run into each other at some point. Knowing I'd be in the same arena as him was paralyzing.

I was walking out of the media room with my producer when we ran dead smack into the man I am now referring to as Stalker. My heart sunk. I was cordial. There was small talk. At one point, my producer started a conversation with a passerby, and Stalker boxed my producer out with his body and asked me, "So are we getting together this week?" My felt sick to my stomach - he didn't get that I wasn't interested AT ALL. I told him no, that any of my free time would be spent with my family (in case he needed to be reminded of the fact that I'm married with children). He told me that was cool - reminded me that he was a dad. He then pulled out his cell and started showing me pictures of his children. Right - he's the world's greatest dad. My producer (who was aware of the situation) told me it was gametime so we went to our seats. I was freaked out enough at this point that I left the game at half-time - I didn't want to run into Stalker after the game. I was home in time to see the 4th quarter.

Two days later, I spent the two hours before Game 4 at the AAC ducking and diving trying to avoid Stalker. At one point in time, he came into the cafeteria where we were eating - he missed me thank God. I got to my seat and breathed a sigh of relief that I was able to avoid him before the game.

I sat in my seat doing what I always do during games - tweeting. The arena lights went out, music was blasting, the crowd was getting pumped, players were being introduced. The atmosphere was awesome and I was sharing it with my "tweeps." My phone beeped a couple of minutes after the game started - I had a text message. It was him. My heart sank. My first thought was not to respond. Crap - he might be watching me, so I better. Here is the conversation that ensued:

Stalker: Enjoying the game? :)

Me: Yep

Stalker: Howya been..busy? :)

Me: As usual

Stalker: Ha I bet

Stalker: Meet soon?

Me: I can't - I'm sorry. Swamped this week. Getting ready for two hearings Thurs. before the game. (sidenote: I thought this might be better than me saying "Dude, you're a creep - please leave me alone." Stalkers are crazy - I didn't want to piss him off.)

Stalker: Hmmm...

Me: Shocking?

Stalker: Ha no just trying to be creative. Find a way.. :)

Stalker: Pondering

Me: Well, anyone who knows me knows time is a luxury - usu spending my free moments with my family... :)

Stalker: Sure. I understand. Dad as well :)

Stalker: I shouldn't have asked to begin with. :)

Me: Never hurts to ask...

Stalker: Well.. R u .. Good? I'm guessing yes:)

Me: Yes... thx.

Stalker: Haha. I figured was hoping otherwise :)

Me: Hope you enjoy the rest of your week.

Stalker: I will.. You as well I'm sure I'll see you in the post game scrum :)!

I didn't respond. A couple minutes later, stalker responded: "Sorry to offend"

I was so irritated and bothered at this point that the two radio guys sitting next to me asked if I was okay. I told them I wasn't - that I was nervous one of the media guys was being a little pushy. I let them read the texts - they seemed as shocked as I was. They told me I was being too nice - which I probably was. I felt better knowing that someone sitting around me was aware of the situation and could help if anything happened. I had my producer come upstairs so he could walk me down after the game. I managed to all but avoid Stalker, except for a quick walk-by during the "post game scrum."

I didn't hear from Stalker after that, but I knew I'd probably run into him at the last home game. During warm-ups, I was chatting with another young African American female journalist. I told her I was avoiding my stalker. She said she had one too. I asked what his name was - it was the same guy! I just about died. So I wasn't the only one he was terrorizing? Apparently, he was extremely more inappropriate with her, asking her at one point if she was a "naughty girl." Let me just say this - had Stalker said ANYTHING like that to me, there would be a sexual harassment lawsuit sitting on his New York desk waiting for him when he got back to the office after the series. He went on to tell her how big his hotel suite was. She was pretty disturbed by his behavior as well. We shared stories during the game and did our best to avoid Stalker.

After the game, I saw him talking to two young Black women courtside. It became very, very clear to me that this dude really is some sort of predator. Seems to me that he has a thing for young African American women (he's Caucasian - his kids are obviously mixed from the pictures he showed me). Maybe his approach has worked for him many times before - I'm assuming it has or he wouldn't be doing it. Stalker was certainly barking up the wrong tree when he met me.

One good thing besides the win last night - it is the last Mavs game at the AAC this season so there will be no chance of running into Stalker. But for good measure, you know I had to run into him one more time last night, right? Maybe he felt the need to apologize after he saw me chatting with the other young lady he was stalking. He apologized. I said it was okay. He interrupted me and told me to let him finish. He apologized again. I was trying my hardest to escape, but he did that box out thing as I avoided making eye contact and told me again to let him finish. He went on to tell me that I'm an incredibly beautiful woman, probably one of the most beautiful women he's ever seen, and that he apologized if he made me feel uncomfortable. I didn't want to say anything - I figured he'd tell me to be quiet and let him finish again.

As if God knew I needed an out, I turn my head and see none other than Pilar Sanders and her entourage walking towards me. Knowing the ever-growing animosity between Pilar and me, I thought, "PERFECT - an escape." I turned to Stalker and told him I had to leave and walked quickly down the hallway towards the elevator. I didn't look back - I'm thinking he might've been surprised that I'd just walked away. He probably thought it had something to do with him. In case he's reading this, it didn't.

I hope Stalker comes across this blog and reads it. His behavior was disturbing - it made me and the other young woman extremely uncomfortable, fearful and intimidated. We altered our plans because of him - he was borderline terroristic. And I am certainly not a fan of people who throw me off my game.

Not every young Black woman is impressed with you because you're on television. You've got to give us more credit than that. When you make continual advances towards a woman and she tells you she's married, or she screens your calls or keeps making excuses to avoid you, she's not interested. Putting smiley faces behind your texts does not make you less of a creep.

D210 Covers the NBA Championship

2011-06-06T20:55:00.006-05:00

We've been covering the Dallas Mavericks for a while now, so to have a championship series being played here is exciting and amazing! Here are some pics from last night's game 3 - to see the Mavs lose by 2 points was heartbreaking!

And yes, that's me with NBA great Magic Johnson.

Photo credit - Vernon Hadnot, D210

End of spring activities

2011-05-26T18:35:00.007-05:00

Bryn had her first dance recital this week. It was pretty informal which is just fine by me - I don't think I'm ready to spend exorbitant amounts on tutu outfits to see her do one dance. But I think this is just the beginning of many recitals to come. We've already got her signed up for the "Tangled" dance program being offered by her school this summer.

Will also had his last baseball game of the season with the Miracle League of Frisco. I was unable to attend the game because I was a guest on a t.v. show discussing autism awareness (fitting), but Ryan reports that Will hit the ball without having to use the tee! I hate I missed that.

There is a way for you to help the Miracle League of Frisco - Liberty Mutual is running a contest on Facebook. The group with the most votes will win $30,000! Please take the time to log on to Facebook and vote. You can vote every day now through sometime in August. Please cut and paste this link and help these amazing kiddos out!

https://www.facebook.com/libertydallas?sk=app_100717463350679

Go shawty, it's ya birthday!

2011-05-17T12:43:00.008-05:00

Bryn celebrated her third birthday this weekend! She was so excited because she got the Dora birthday cake she'd been asking for. The things we do as parents for our kids - I had to go to four places to find a Dora cake (I won't EVER order a cake from Kroger again - this one came from Target). But Bryn loved it and was so happy she finally got her Dora birthday cake.

On Sunday, Bryn was in for a special birthday treat, but we had to take some time for a quick birthday photo shoot! Little mama loves getting dressed up - put her in a tutu dress and she's ready to go.

I decided instead of a big party this year, we'd do something smaller to celebrate Bryn's birthday. So we picked up her BFF Ava and went to the American Girl store in Dallas.

The girls had a blast browsing through the store and picking out their new dolls. Bryn wasn't too interested in playing with her doll, but she thought it was a hoot that the doll's eyes closed when she "went to sleep."

We wrapped up our adventure with lunch in the cafe complete with cake and ice cream! It truly was a special birthday!

SWEEP!

2011-05-09T14:22:00.005-05:00

As lifelong Lakers fans, it has been unbelievably difficult to watch Los Angeles implode over the last couple of weeks. The good news is, having covered the Mavs for D210 over the last couple of years, I've grown to love my hometown team and I'm excited they are doing so well in the playoffs. During a recent game, I decided to have a little fun with Bryn - I may have a budding sports reporter on my hands, but we've got some work to do...

Weekend update

2011-05-09T12:27:00.007-05:00

First of all, happy mother's day to all the moms out there! I often say being a mom is the hardest job there is when done right. I hope everyone had an awesome mom's day - you deserve it! Ryan spoiled me with some much needed R & R - after a long weekend, I got up long enough yesterday to eat lunch, then went back to bed and didn't roll out again until 4 p.m.! The perfect way to spend my day after a very long weekend! On Friday, we took Will to see the RoughRiders game in Frisco. I had to rush off because I was covering the Mavs v. Lakers game for D210. I got to the AAC a little late but was amazed at the sea of blue in the stands. The Mavs fan were pumped and thrilled to see their team take a 3-0 lead in the series against the defending world champs. The atmosphere was truly electric! After the game, we went to the locker room for interviews. Lamar Odom stood in the hall with a sea of reporters holding microphones in his face. One of the reporters from L.A. was peppering Lamar with questions - I've encountered this reporter before and he's pretty pushy. I'm not a fan. Anyway, the remarkable thing to me was that Lamar was speechless - literally speechless. The reporter would ask a question, Lamar would try to answer, and nothing came out. He just shook his head. That was the generally feeling around the locker room - everyone was pretty speechless. I have to give a shoot out to Tyson Chandler of the Mavs. During interviews, I asked a question at the same time as another reporter. Tyson answered the guy's question, then gave me an opportunity to answer mine. I really appreciated it. Female reporters often aren't given any respect behind the scenes - it's great when the players make us feel welcome. After the game, I had to rush off to Bella 32 where my Football Wives castmate Chanita Foster and I were headlining. Wish I had some pictures to share but my purse was too small for a camera. We had a blast and I didn't get home until around 3 in the morning. The folks at Bella 32 are a class act and we love hanging out over there! On Saturday morning, Football Wives castmate Melani Ismail and I joined fellow castmate Chanita Foster as she received an award. I was functioning off of very little sleep - surprised this pic came out so nice. I was thrilled to be one of the hosts for The Collections Fashion Show benefiting Children's Medical Center. The designers of Varela + Brooks hooked my co-host and I up with custom-made couture gowns. I felt like a princess! The show was amazing and I look forward to being a part of the event again next year.

Busy weekend!

2011-05-03T13:18:00.009-05:00

And now I'm playing catch up - where to begin?!?!?

Let's start with last week's royal wedding. I'm one of those chicks who still believes in fairytales. I love that a young model strutting her stuff down the catwalk can catch the eye of a prince, and ten years later, she becomes the belle of the ball decked out in couture and sashaying down the ultimate runway - the wedding aisle.

I decided not to wake up at the butt crack of dawn to catch the royal nuptials as they happened. I need my sleep, and I figured with the constant media coverage and DVR, I wouldn't miss a thing, especially the one thing I was really waiting to see - the wedding dress. When I first saw Kate's gown, I thought it was pretty but unremarkable. I was hoping to be "wowed" and that certainly wasn't my first reaction. But, the dress has grown on me and I love it - classic "Grace Kelly" inspired fashion that will certainly stand the test of time, unlike Lady Di's dress which screams "80s ballgown."

Kate changed into another gown later in the evening, and I think I loved it even more! I love the look of the sweater over the dress with the casual hair. Perfection!

The event seemed to captivate the world. It was neat watching the millions of people descend on Buckingham Palace to catch the couples' first kiss. It was definitely memorable.

All daydreaming aside, this weekend was a busy and memorable one for personal reasons. After months of planning, the 4th annual Silver Dollar Ball took place Saturday night under a tent in the pasture at XO Ranch in Aubrey. The weather was perfect after having rain scares throughout the week. As the publicity chair for the event, it is always wonderful to see everything come together.

We raised a ton of money for the American Cancer Society and I even got to hang out with Football Wives castmate Amanda Davis who came to the event with hubby Leonard.

One of the highlights of the evening was when the band Free Reign took the stage. Leonard, our honorary chair Marc Colombo and teammate Cory Proctor have their own metal band. Headline entertainer Neal McCoy invited the guys to come on stage and do their thing. It was awesome!

Other Cowboy notables like Jason Witten were in the house to help celebrate the event. A fantastic time was had by all! Live auction chair Ashleigh and I even hammed it up a bit and played off of our Mission Possible: Find the Cure-theme.

Ryan was gone most of last week, so I was truly doing the super-mom thing last week - working, watching the kids, organizing and setting up for the event. By Sunday night, I was dead tired. I popped an Ambien and was out like a light around 9:30.

Around 10 o'clock, I woke up to a popping sound. I quickly realized it was hailing outside. I was a little concerned because of the record-breaking tornado outbreak that hit the south last week - hail usually indicates bad weather. I hopped on Twitter and tweeted about the hail, then quickly realized something was up - lots of people were tweeting that President Obama was going to make an announcement that evening. I quickly turned on CNN where it was being reported that the President was set to announce that we'd found and killed Osama Bin Laden. Sure enough, President Obama informed the nation that a team of Navy Seals infiltrated Bin Laden's hideout in Pakistan and killed him. I sat it stunned silence as I watched, and realized an incredible sense of relief had taken over. I remember where I was on 9.11.01 - I remember watching the Twin Towers fall. I remember crying and being scared to death of what the terrorists had done to our country. And finally, we'd caught and killed the mastermind behind it all. Justice.

I'm exhausted revisiting the weekend. And you know me - a busy weekend is usually my break from a hectic and chaotic week. I'm looking forward to an event coming up this weekend - the Collections Fashion Show benefiting Children's Medical Center here in Dallas. I'm a co-host of this event, and I was thrilled when I learned that one of the designers featured in the show - Varela & Brooks - were going to design a dress for me to wear! SCORE! We've done a couple of fittings and I'm looking forward to strutting my stuff in the gown this weekend. I bet I'll feel a little like a princess...

Easter 2011

2011-04-28T23:08:00.005-05:00

Opening Day - Miracle League of Frisco

2011-04-19T21:17:00.005-05:00

My sister Kristi and her husband AC were here for a visit over the weekend. So excited they got to join us for opening day of Frisco Miracle League's baseball season! Will had an absolute blast!!!! We're looking forward to a great season.

Silver Dollar Ball is right around the corner!

2011-04-11T09:40:00.002-05:00

Here's a video I put together about the event - tickets are available at www.silverdollarball.org

Dallas Rocks Against Autism

2011-04-11T08:34:00.005-05:00

Ryan and I had a chance to participate in a phenomenal event here in Dallas on Saturday night - the inaugural Dallas Rocks Against Autism! The turnout was wonderful and fun times were had by all. Autism warrior mom Jenny McCarthy came into town for the event. Special thanks to Julie Liberman and Christy Edwards for their donations for the raffle!

More pictures from Mrs. Texas 2011 - 3rd Runner Up

2011-03-26T21:36:00.004-05:00

Our photographer Larry Wright hooked us up once again...

Finally... a side hustle

2011-03-26T21:17:00.009-05:00

I am so excited to announce that I've joined a new team - I am now a consultant for Rodan+Fields! You may not have heard of Rodan+Fields, but I bet you've heard of Proactiv Solution. Well, Rodan + Fields are the dermatologists who created Proactiv, and they've created a line of other skincare products to address everything from sun damage to aging! The products are wildly popular and effective - their new AMP MD product was recently featured on The Today Show as one of four must-have anti-aging products for 2011! To say I'm excited about this opportunity is an understatement - I'm pumped!

I've been approached numerous times over the years to join direct marketing teams. Cosmetics, acai berry drinks, handbags, jewelry. All presented their own unique opportunities, but none of them really seemed to fit my lifestyle and personality.

I first heard about Rodan+Fields earlier this month, and before my sponsor Shannon Patterson (outgoing Mrs. Texas America 2010 and top-six finisher at Mrs. America) could even finish the presentation, I knew I had to jump on board.

Both the products and business opportunity couldn't be passed up. The earning potential of the business really peaked my interest - the company has only been involved in direct marketing for about two years, so it's relatively new and the market here in Dallas is pretty untapped - there is definitely potential to grow and we are looking to grow our team!

Here's the link to my website - feel free to check it out! If you have any questions about the products or the business opportunity, please let me know! I'm looking forward to these products decreasing my addiction to botox - the fine lines in my forehead are already disappearing thanks to AMP MD - no more doctor's needles for me thanks to Rodan+Fields.

http://dawnneufeld.myrandf.com

Check out the pictures from my business launch!

Spring break at the Dallas Arboretum

2011-03-18T21:17:00.006-05:00

I left work a little early Friday to venture to the Dallas Arboretum with my mini-me. I've been to the Arboretum once before for a meeting, but it was at night so I was unable to really appreciate the beauty of this treasure of a sanctuary in Dallas. The grounds are just stunning - seeing all the tulips in bloom on White Rock Lake was inspiring! I plan on going back soon - alone! I can imagine it is a wonderful place to bring a blanket, a book and relax!

D210 TV, Krave Magazine & Boris Kodjoe

2011-03-13T10:28:00.005-05:00

I am one of the hosts of D210 TV - www.d210.tv - a wonderful entertainment and sports show that airs on the Texas Channel on Time Warner Cable. My schedule recently hasn't allowed me to host as much as I'd like, but when I got a text the other day that actor Boris Kodjoe was in town to host an event and was willing to do an interview, I didn't hesitate to make sure I was available. To say I'm a fan is an understatement.

We were invited to check out the Krave Magazine photoshoot Boris was participating in. I had a chance to meet Boris at a Super Bowl event I hosted, so it was great to be able to say "hello" again. Boris is married to the lovely and talented Nicole Ari Parker. They have two children, and their daughter Sophie was born with Spina Bifida. They have been very vocal about some of the issues their family has dealt with, and I was excited to hear about their foundation - check it out... http://www.sophiesvoicefoundation.org/home.html

During the interview yesterday, my co-host Erica and I found out that Boris and his brother Patrick have started a clothing line - through www.worldofalfa.com, you can order affordable, custom-made suits. After being in the NFL and knowing what Ryan paid for his custom suits, I was shocked to hear that you can get suits on this site for around $200. I was thoroughly impressed.

I had a chance to ask Boris about some of the recent projects he's worked on. He starred in a show called "The Undercovers." Last year, his wife starred in another series that I fell in love with - "The Deep End." I was hooked on both shows, but after only one season, they were both cancelled. I asked about the shows getting cancelled so quickly - in a nutshell, Boris talked about how shows are completely ratings-based, and networks aren't giving them a chance to develop a real fan base. I can't compare a reality show like "Football Wives" to an actual show, but I definitely could appreciate the sentiment. Boris and Nicole are getting ready to work on a project together - I can't wait to hear more about it.

Anyway, this interview was a great reason to come out of semi-retirement. More D210 coverage coming soon...

3rd Runner Up - Mrs. Texas

2011-03-05T23:59:00.003-05:00

I cracked the top 5 again this year!!!! The competition was intense, so it was a thrill and honor to place third runner up! Ryan even came up to me and said I have to keep doing the pageant because he thinks I can win! Thanks to my friend Miesha who made the trek from Frisco for the pageant - she took this pic. Our friend David Podwika came to support as well - he's got some pics for me I'll post tomorrow.

Special thanks to Bonnie Benavidez of Avasiare for hooking up my makeup tonight - it looked AMAZING!

The Eve of Mrs. Texas...

2011-03-05T00:36:00.002-05:00

Tonight, I did what any good pageant girl SHOULDN'T do with competition just hours away. First, at dinner, I ate a roll. Carbs are pretty much a no-no right before bikini time, but I was hungry, so I ate one. And had a brownie shortly thereafter. I should've felt some tinge of concern when another contestant said she didn't want to blow her diet by eating the salad. Nah - I'm sticking to TEAM CARBS.

Completely content with my belly full of bread and chocolate, another contestant and I decided to head over to Two Doors Down in downtown Corsicana for karaoke night. I gathered that DaLana could actually sing by her enthusiastic renditions of our pageant songs while we were practicing. I, on the other hand, can't carry a tune in a bucket, but I figured if I'm going to be sashaying practically naked in front of hundreds of folks tomorrow during the pageant, what's the big deal? I belted out a very, very bad rendition of Faith Hill's 'This Kiss." Sorry Faith - it was awful. But we wrapped up our night on the town in Corsicana by doing the karaoke cha cha slide. My thighs are sore from going way too low, but DaLana and I had fun! Definitely a memorable moment from the weekend.

I'm getting in bed but wanted to write a few quick thoughts about the pageant. It's a small field this year - 19 women if I'm correct. In my first two pageants, there were around 30 contestants. There is a wonderful mix this year of younger newlyweds with no kids to seasoned vets with teenagers - lots of truly amazing women. I've got my competition cut out for me.

I wish I would've been well to work out more - having to take the last month off from exercise may hinder me this year. But oh well - it is what it is. I'm a 34-year-old mom with two kids who works and can't afford to spend hours in the gym everyday. Reality check. So I've got to get on that stage tomorrow and work it like I'm rockin' some Giselle Bundchen gams.

Will post some pics by the end of the week. There are bikini and opening number pics (neither that I love) on the Mrs. Texas site - www.mrstexas.net - Galleries - swimsuit.

Enjoy, and wish me like. Everybody clap your hands - clap, clap, clap, clap, clap...

My votes - Best and Worst Dressed at the Oscars

2011-03-01T23:23:00.002-05:00

Oscar night is like the Super Bowl for folks in the industry. The glitz and glam are intoxicating. We can't wait to see which celebrity will knock the ball out of the park or crush their competition in ballgowns and jewels. This year's show hosted by Anne Hathaway and James Franco was forgettable, but some of the evenings fashions were not!

Here are my faves of the evening:
Halle Berry - can this woman ever get it wrong? Flawless.
Oscar Red Carpet 2011: Best Dressed : People.com : People.com

Gwyneth Paltrow - the country singing hip hop lovin' chica in what looked like pure gold or silver on the red carpet. Perfection!
Oscar Red Carpet 2011: Best Dressed : People.com : People.com

One of my absolute best-dressed faves - the queen Celine Dion looking STUNNING!
Oscar Red Carpet 2011: Best Dressed : People.com : People.com

Well done Hilary Swank!
Oscar Red Carpet 2011: Best Dressed : People.com : People.com

And my least faves:
Reese Witherspoon - and I love Reese. But she was too reminiscient of an old school Barbie. She can, and will, do better.
Oscar Red Carpet 2011: Best Dressed : People.com

Amy Adams - almost an okay for me because I like the blue dress, but hated the necklace thrown on top of it.
Oscar Red Carpet 2011: Best Dressed : People.com : People.com

Jennifer Hudson - loved the dress, but couldn't get past the mommy boobs. Some cutlets and tape could've helped.
Oscar Red Carpet 2011: Best Dressed : People.com : People.com

Nicole Kidman - worst dressed of the night. I heard this dress was stunning on the runway. The clothes on size negative 2s usually look fantastic. Looks don't always translate from runway to the red carpet. Here is one of those situations.
Oscar Red Carpet 2011: Best Dressed : People.com : People.com

Gearing up for the Mrs. Texas Pageant!

2011-03-01T22:40:00.004-05:00

Sorry for the lapse in posts - I've been trying to regroup since Super Bowl week and I'm still playing catch up. And it's March! I promise, promise, promise to do better.

I'm heading to Corsicana on Thursday to compete in this year's Mrs. Texas America pageant. The event is Saturday night at the Palace Theater. It's my third year competing and I'm looking forward to some girl time this weekend! Last year I cracked the top 5 and even won the award for Best Interview! I'm hopeful about what I might accomplish this year.

I wanted to take a moment to thank my sponsors - I could not have competed this year without their support!

Sheila Stoutmire, Sheila's Training - www.sheilastraining.com
Bonnie Benavidez, Avasiare Professional Skincare and Cosmetics - www.avasiare.com
Debbie Quintanilla, 2Q Salon/ Lashes N Brows - www.2qsalon.com
Noreen Nartia and Chris Blumenshine, Bellissimo Foto - www.bellissimofoto.com (let them know I sent you and you'll get a 10% discount)

Make sure you check out the Mrs. Texas website - www.mrstexas.net. I'll be sure to post updates and pictures (promise)!

Super Bowl is coming to the Big D!

2011-01-26T11:32:00.011-05:00

One of the perks of being a football wife has been enjoying Super Bowl festivities over the years. Actually, when I was in college, I worked for Rodney Peete and Holly Robinson Peete and we threw an amazing fashion show at Super Bowl every year for their founation, so I've been hitting up Super Bowl cities for over a decade. With the big game making it's way to Dallas this year, we are going to be busy!!!! Here are some of the events I'm involved in this year. Tickets are available for these events, so come on out and join me!!!! Most of these are charity events so come out and have a good time while giving back!

Sunday, January 30th

Tuesday, February 1st and Wednesday, February 2nd

Wednesday, February 3rd

Friday, February 4th - Off the Field Football Wives' Association Fashion Show

www.offthefieldpwa.com/fashionshow

Saturday, February 5th

www.thesupercamp.com

The Game at Bella 32

2011-01-21T22:01:00.006-05:00

Here are a couple of pics from the party appearance last week. We had such a fun night! I didn't get to bed until after three - my dogs were killing me! Loved my
Go Sports Jewelry (www.gosportsjewelry.com) football pendant I wore. Thought it was appropriate since Chanita and I were there repping Football Wives!

"Show Me the Money"

2011-01-18T21:45:00.002-05:00

"Show Me the Money." Mention this piece of film brilliance and most people know it comes from the movie "Jerry Maguire." I sat in a meeting last week about the upcoming NFL lockout, and it was one of the first things that popped into my mind. Concerned with the ramifications of the ongoing NFL/NFLPA collective bargaining agreement negotiations, I asked former NFLer and current NFLPA representative Scott Turner to fill us in on the current state of affairs. I will try to regurgitate the plethora of information he gave us as best as I can. There are currently 1900 active players, over 18,000 retired players, and countless others who will be affected by a lockout so this is important info and worth telling.

Scott began by giving us a little history about the current CBA which is set to expire March 3rd. Both sides - the NFL (representing the owners) and the NFLPA (representing the players) - agreed to bargain "in good faith" in the event of conflict over the CBA. The CBA was signed in 2006 and was supposed to run through 2012 but the NFL owners have opted out of the final year of the agreement. Some food for thought though - the owners didn't opt out of the agreement recently. They opted out way back in 2008 - just two years after agreeing to the CBA. The owners claimed that in this struggling economy, NFL teams were struggling financially and they believed players needed to incur some of the financial loss. The NFLPA asked to see the corporate books of the teams - the thought process being that if teams are struggling financially, they should look at areas that were actually struggling and address those particular areas instead of imputing blanket responsibility.

Bob Batterman, the labor and employment attorney responsible for orchestrating the NHL lockout in 2007, has been hired to represent the NFL. His response to the NFLPA's request to see the books - "The owner's profit is none of your business." Curious - is that what bargaining "in good faith" looks like? Is the NFLPA supposed to just take the NFL's word for it that they are struggling financially, so much so that they now want to impose some of that financial loss on players? I mean, we know how much the NFL really cares about the players - as evidenced by the fact that they only recently acknowledged concussions might lead to long-term mental disabilities for players.

Struggling financially, huh? Let's look at some of the facts. NFL teams are cash cows. Most teams have increased in value over 500%. Nine NFL franchises top the list of Forbes most valuable sports franchises. In comparison, there is one MLB team on that list - the New York Yankees. The most valuable NFL franchise is the Dallas Cowboys of course. The Green Bay Packers, the only publicly-owned team in the NFL, reported it's earnings at $25 million last year. Sounds like a lot of money to me in a struggling economy. Yet team owners want us to believe they are struggling so much, it's time to pass that burden on to the players?

Here is what the current fight is over - 18/18. The NFL wants to increase the regular season to 18 games while forcing players to take an 18% pay cut. Let's start by talking about the 18 games. Currently, there are four preseason and 16 regular season games. Many folks have wanted to do away with the preseason forever. From the owner's perspective, they aren't very profitable. From the player's perspective, there is certainly an increased risk for injury, and if you aren't on that opening day roster, for most players that means you're not getting paid. If the owners get what they want, there will be 2 preseason games and 18 regular season games. So what's the big deal? It still equals 20 games.

Regular season games are more intense and take a larger toll on players. Many vets only see a significant amount of playing time in two preseason games anyway so for many of them, taking away two of their preseason games and tacking them onto the regular season REALLY means playing two more games. The average NFL game consists of 70 plays. Most players aren't getting that many downs in the preseason, but tacking them on in the regular season will mean more downs played. Scott asked the guys in the room how they feel around week 6 or week 7 of the regular season. Already hurting by that time of year, a couple guys responded that they wonder how they'll get through the rest of the season. Adding two more games will certainly create a huge burden on the players. With over 400 players going on season-ending injured reserve during the 2010 season, it is valid concern.

Now let's look at statistics. Currently, the average NFL career is 3.2 years. The NFLPA estimates that if those two games are tacked onto the regular season, the average career will decrease to 2.9 years. Where this becomes a huge issue for players is that you don't become vested (and eligible for post-career insurance and benefits) until you play three credited seasons. More players getting hurt/shorter careers equals fewer benefits packages being paid out by the teams to former players. Insurance is expensive - bet they could save a lot of money since fewer players will become vested with an 18-game season.

As I mentioned before, preseason games aren't very lucrative. Conversely, adding 2 games to the regular season will add $500 million in discretionary income to NFL teams. Since those funds are discretionary, the NFL can use it on the players "if they want." I'm assuming they won't be writing any bonus checks since they are already struggling.

The NFLPA came back with some counter-proposals for the 18-game regular season. If the owners wanted more games, the NFLPA thinks there should be 5 or 6 more players on a roster (currently 53 players) to allow for players to heal from injuries or rest when needed. The NFL came back and offered one extra player and he could only play special teams. Huh? If there's a longer season, maybe there should be a shorter offseason program with fewer mini-camps, shorter training camps, etc. The NFL's response? Not happening.

The kicker is that it's not like the NFL is trying to pay players more for playing more. In fact, they want them to incur an 18% cut in pay. This would come in the form of charging players for travel expenses (that's right - players would have to pay to travel to away games), and facility and stadium maintenance. Seriously - players would have to pay to maintain the facilities, yet they'd have no financial stake in them. There would be no income paid for sold-out concerts or circuses in the facilities they were being charged to maintain. Can you imagine if your boss came to you and told you you'd have to take a pay cut so you could help maintain your office? And the fact that the NFL is so fleeting - that one day you could be on a roster and the next day you're packing your bags and turning in your playbook - is it really fair to ask players to pay to maintain a stadium they may not even be playing in?

The disagreements over these issues are leading to a potential lockout. There have been 36 negotiating sessions with no real progress, so the notion that there may not be a season in 2011 is inching towards becoming reality. Players are quick to tell you that this is not a strike - they WANT to play but they can't and won't under the owner's currently proposed 18/18 plan.

One of the wives in the meeting asked a great question - why would the NFL owners be playing such hardball? If there's no season in 2011, they won't be making "jack poo" either. Well, this isn't true. The NFL owners actually negotiated a media deal that will allow them to be paid even if there is no football played. How much will the owners make from the networks? $4 billion. That's right - that's BILLION with a "B." That means each team will get about $333 million if not one down is played in the fall of 2011. The owners are covered - they'd be making plenty of "poo."

So this all comes down to money - owners want more and players want to keep what they currently have. Can you blame players? Most aren't making millions and with the average career lasting 3.2 years (for now), shouldn't they try to get as much as they can?

There are very real consequences if the CBA expires and no new agreement is signed. Current players will loss their insurance and will have to pay for COBRA. COBRA isn't cheap - it can run close to $2,000/month for a family of four. COBRA only lasts for 18 months. Players will also lose their income if there is no season. Stadium employees from the parking attendants to the suite managers won't get paid. The financial impact could be huge.

We did get some good news in the meeting. Retired players currently receiving benefits will continue to get those benefits. Ryan and I often contemplated what it would be like to have to spend $2,000/month on insurance. It's money we don't really have to spare. And with his football injuries and Will's autism, it would be nearly impossible for us to find outside insurance. When Scott informed us that we'd still have insurance come March, I cried.

I asked Scott what we can do. He wants current players to OPEN THEIR MAIL!!!!! Anything they get from the NFLPA, our insurance company, etc. could contain time-sensitive information (players only have 60 days to file for COBRA - if they miss the deadline, they are SOL). He said let the NFLPA do their job - they are working very hard for the players. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that this will all get worked out.

Bottom line - this lockout comes down to money. Instead of the NFL owners trying to take from the little piece of the pie that the players get, they need to spread the "wealth" among themselves and stop asking the players to "show them the money." How about owners show us their money - then maybe both sides can come to the table and really start talking.

Check out www.nfllockout.com for more information.

My Golden Globes Fashion Wrap Up

2011-01-17T20:39:00.013-05:00

I had a great time chillin' with some BFFs watching the Golden Globes last night. I missed all my usual Sunday programming - Baskeball Wives, football, etc. - to watch the Globes' pre-game. The red carpet did not disappoint!

My favorites:

Olivia Wilde in a stunning Marchesa gown. I know, it was a LOT of dress, but it took my breath away!

Megan Fox in Armani Prive'

Carrie Underwood in a phenomenal Badgley Mischka

Catherine Zeta Jones in Monique Lhuillier. I tried on a Monique Lhuillier gown once - fit like a glove. But is cost $5,500. It stayed at the store.

Claire Danes in Calvin Klein Collection

And after waffling for a while, I've decided my hands down favorite was Halle Berry. I want to be her when I grow up!

When I first saw the dress, I thought she might need to be very careful since there was minimal fabric - no need for flashing on the red carpet. But I just dig this look on her - amazing!

My least faves were:
Angelina Jolie and Anna Hathaway (the back of the dress was gorgeous - I hated the front) - I wasn't really feeling the dynasty throwback dresses.

Leighton Meester

Emma Stone (way too matronly for her)

You don't see Helena Bonham Carter on the list - I never expect much from her and would actually be borrowed if she didn't show up Bjork-inspired.

On a non-fashion note, I was so happy that Colin Firth won for his role the The King's Speech. The movie was phenomenal and he as brilliant in it. Two thumbs up!

I know it's last minute...

2011-01-14T19:22:00.001-05:00

But this is where I'll be tonight! It's going down!

Blitz and Glam - What's In My Purse?

2011-01-14T14:22:00.004-05:00

There is a lovely lady by the name of Tamara who runs a wonderful website - www.blitzandglam.com - it's where fashion meets football. Who doesn't love that?!? She's been a wonderful supporter of me and Football Wives, so when she asked me to post a vlog on her website for one of her new features - What's In My Bag? - I didn't hesitate!

And yes - I really do carry this much stuff in my purse!

A little uplifting...

2011-01-11T22:49:00.004-05:00

There is nothing better than hearing a child's laugh. Bryn has a funny one - she cracks me up.

I just thought that was funny and wanted to share.

You know me and my horoscopes. I'm not a horoscope worshiper by any means, but every once in a while, I come by one that hits very close to home and ends up giving me a little hope. Ryan and I have been struggling with the transition out of football - what is he going to do for a career? Do I need to go back to work full time at the expense of my child, charity work, etc.? Lots of big questions. Then I came across this: If you have developed a pessimistic attitude recently because things have not gone your way, you need to free yourself from the negativity. You may have endured some difficulties over the last few weeks. It may seem that even though you've worked hard, been diligent in your efforts, and done your very best to deal with what life has thrown at you, things have not improved significantly and you're feeling tired of facing the same old problems. But don't give up - the universe is gearing up to assist you. Very soon, your life will take on a more carefree tone, and prosperity will be knocking at your door. Sounds about right...

Looking back...

2010-12-31T23:24:00.002-05:00

This has been an interesting year for the Neufelds. There were a lot of amazing things we experienced this year - some notables being Football Wives and everything it brought with it, Kristi's wedding, Andrea's pregnancy. There were some difficulties as well though - Ryan's injury and the official end of his professional football career, financial uncertainty, lay-offs and job searches. What I can say definitively is this - I believe that everything we experience in life has a purpose, and how we respond will determine the outcome of the upcoming chapters in our lives. So, with that, I close the chapter on 2010 and look forward to the challenges and triumphs coming in the new year.

Thanks to everyone for your continuing encouragement and support!

As for how the Neufelds spent this new year's eve - well, Bryn had a party at her crib and her buddies wore her out!

That's a Wrap! Or is it....

2010-12-31T14:31:00.002-05:00

Over the last couple of days, I've had NUMEROUS emails, blog responses, etc. sent to me about Football Wives. Our season finale was almost two weeks ago, but thanks to on demand, reruns and the internet, more and more folks are seeing the show and aren't too happy with me. Some responses have been just awful - one even blamed me for Will's autism. The person called it my "karma." Some are almost comical - someone spent an unimaginable amount of energy responding to my Anonymous Haters post. The response was deleted almost immediately. I'm happy people are able to vent, but you might want to do so where I don't have control over what gets posted.

Here's the REALITY - it's a freaking television show! If you spend any more than the 22 minutes a week it aired during the season contemplating who is prettier, richer, the better Christian, etc., you might want to get a life. I'm just saying. Heading into the New Year, I suggest you find a more meaningful hobby than hating on me.

Blessings.

Dear Anonymous Haters...

2010-12-23T20:48:00.002-05:00

This is my blog and I will not post your obsessive, hateful comments. I suggest you get a life and unless you're going to be a positive influence on mine, beat it. By the way, you're not saying anything new or creative that I haven't already heard, so save your energy and/or refocus it on someone who gives a (insert expletive).

Smooches!

Finally made it to visit Santa!

2010-12-23T20:23:00.002-05:00

We're usually really good about getting to the mall early during the holiday season to get the kids' picture with Santa. With work, Football Wives, etc., time slipped away from me. I looked up last week and realized I really didn't have time to do Christmas cards this year - it's been about a decade since we haven't sent out a card! So bummed!

We managed to get to Willow Bend today and stood in line for about two hours before we finally got to see the big guy. The kids did surprisingly well all things considered. A treat for the kids at Willow Bend - right before you get to see Santa, you have to wait in a big igloo-looking room with "snow" falling from the ceiling. Will and Bryn absolutely loved it, but I'll be vacuuming up snow for weeks!

Anyway, this pic makes my aching feet totally worth the wait!

Merry Christmas from the Neufelds

2010-12-22T14:19:00.001-05:00

We aren't doing a Neufeld Christmas card this year - not because we're trying to be green. I just ran out of time! We still have to take the kids to see Santa! In the meantime, enjoy...

Personalize funny videos and birthday eCards at JibJab!

Football Wives Season Finale

2010-12-21T14:57:00.004-05:00

Sunday morning before Ryan and I left for Cowboys stadium, I made sure I tweeted and Facebooked my usual reminder to make sure everyone tuned in to Football Wives. It was finally time for the season finale, and I knew we'd need big ratings for the network and producers to consider a second season. When I watched the episode that evening, I was devastated. The episode portrayed me as angry and bitter and someone consumed with envy and jealousy. It was upsetting because that certainly wasn't my reality, and after all of the work I've done to promote the show this season, it was hard for me to swallow that I'd been portrayed as the broken, miserable, bad guy (or girl).

Here's my final post-episode blog post. To say that I've learned a valuable reality t.v. lesson is an understatement. I wanted to be a part of the cast because it was finally an opportunity to tell what it's really like to be married to a pro-football player. But instead of focusing on the the reality of our life - making it through the transition, having a child with special needs, having a strong foundation with an appreciation for the important things in life - the drama in my edited reality took center stage.

We've already been told that there probably won't be a reunion show which doesn't surprise me. But I sure hope there is a season two - might give me an opportunity to set the record straight!

Have vs. Have Not

“Football Wives finale Sunday” was a highly-anticipated day in the Neufeld household. In addition to the airing of our final episode, we’d been invited by Amanda Davis to sit in her field-level suite at Cowboys stadium to see our home team take on the rival Washington Redskins. The Cowboys took an early lead but the defense faltered and the Redskins tied it up late in the fourth quarter. Our own David Buehler ended up kicking the game-winning field goal. The stadium erupted with excitement – we were so happy for him and Brittany.

Sunday was also a “first” for Ryan – it was his first time attending an NFL game when he wasn’t suited up on the field playing. I’m sure it was a little emotional for him and I bet he imagined himself on that field in front of 100,000 cheering fans making tackles and catching passes. But after standing for a quarter, Ryan had to sit down because his back started aching. We were reminded of the toll the game he’s played and loved for so many years has taken on him physically – he couldn’t play another season if he wanted to. I think knowing you can’t be on the field playing makes it a little easier to sit back and enjoy the show.

Shortly after kick-off, my cell phone started buzzing with texts, phone calls, Twitter mentions and Facebook messages. This was the first Sunday all season I haven’t caught the early airing of the show, and I’d have to wait all day to see what all the chatter was about. One message on Twitter said, “Just watched. Time to unfollow you. Wow. You can give it but you can’t take it…” “Take what?” I wondered out loud. Another message read, “I’m sorry but you’re a BITCH!! Let people live!!... How the hell you an attorney and mom?” Someone was attacking my credibility and ability to be a good mother based on what they saw on the show? Knowing that the finale featured our cast trip to New York, I thought back to what happened on the trip and while I knew there had been drama, I didn’t think it was all that bad and I wondered what I’d done to become the person people love to hate. A good friend who I love and trust then wrote, “Not liking your portrayal. You and Chanita look bitter. Poor editing.” As much as I’d anticipated the season finale, the comments had me pretty worried.

As I watched the show, I understood why people were saying I was bitter and jealous. If I were watching the episode and didn’t know me, I’d probably be going off as well. Why wouldn’t people think I’m overly consumed with Pilar when EVERY SINGLE SCENE I’m in, I’m talking about her? I’ve always taken responsibility for my behavior on the show (as I think everyone should), and I stand by the fact that what viewers have seen was real and not staged. What I cannot stand is when only part of the story is told. To see a four-day trip wrapped up in so much conflict and drama was disheartening. I certainly didn’t spend my time away from Ryan and the kids focusing on Pilar, though the storytellers sure would like you to think I did.

There are a couple things I noticed while watching the episode – did anyone else notice how busted everyone’s hair looked? We made it to New York just as tropical storm Nicole gripped the city and the humidity was awful. Many women reading this can relate to the havoc humidity can wreak on one’s coif. I think we took the Texas humidity with us to the big city.

Another thing I noticed – viewers don’t get to see how much fun we had in New York because of the drama. We took a private cruise around the city – what an awesome way to take in the sights! We marveled at the skyline, reflected when we closed in on Ground Zero, and saluted when we neared the Statue of Liberty. We had a ball! And the night Chanita, Erin, Brittany, Jay and I went out on the town, we didn’t get in until after 4 a.m.! We danced on couches singing “Come on Eileen” in one club and Diddy’s “Hello, Good Morning” in another. We hit up three different clubs that night and even took pictures in an empty Times Square before heading back to the Paramount where we were staying. I hadn’t had that much fun in years. It truly was a night to remember and Chanita and I talked about how it was one of those “bucket list” outings we’ll remember forever.

Our first night in New York, we ate dinner at The Strand and enjoyed the fabulous views of the Empire State Building from the rooftop. The clouds were rolling in and created an almost-magical backdrop for the evening. I meant what I said to Chanita that night – Pilar wasn’t thinking about us, so we had to make sure we didn’t let her ruin our trip. I was as confused as everyone else watching the episode – how could I go from telling Chanita we needed to move on to talking about Pilar in all the subsequent scenes? Interestingly enough, I think back to New York - Pilar and I were on the same return flight to Dallas after our trip. We stood about a foot apart waiting to board the plane when Pilar told me, “You know I don’t have a problem with you, right?” Could’ve fooled me…

The dinner on our last night in New York was a bummer for all of us. While the Pilar-vs.-everyone dynamic was expected, no one saw the Dawn-Chanita-Melani argument coming. Many people don’t understand why I became so upset with Melani at dinner. Truth is, she’d become a confidante and good friend. I often had long conversations with Melani while we were shooting the show. We’d talk about the “work” aspect of shooting a reality show and the relationships and conflicts that were forming. The week before we left for New York, I’d expressed to Melani my only concern about participating on the show – the fact that it could potentially affect my career as an attorney depending on how it was edited. I wondered if I’d be made to look like I drink excessively since the cameras always seemed to focus on my choice of beverage even though many of the other ladies were having a cocktail as well. I’d used profanity and taken a spin around a stripper pole on the back of a boat – activities that some might think are socially and/or professionally unacceptable – and it was all caught on camera. Melani told me to pray about it and tried to assure me that everything would be okay.

Being our resident peacemaker, Melani was understandably upset about the drama and tension. She expressed that she was tired of people being thrown under the bus for the sake of television. We were walking that fine line between creating an entertaining (i.e. drama-filled) television show while staying true to the women we are. It was hard to accept that the line was being crossed almost daily while we were filming, but my television background helped me understand that folks wouldn’t be tuning into Football Wives to watch us sing “Kumbaya.”

Viewers weren’t privy to these conversations I’d had with Melani so they wouldn’t understand why I was so sensitive to the fact that she’d bring up my career to call me out on my behavior towards Pilar. Melani had just thrown me under the same bus she was tired of everyone being under. I was incredibly hurt – I felt like I’d told someone my most intimate secrets in confidence and that she’d turned around and shouted them from the top of the Empire State Building. I know Melani never would’ve intentionally hurt me, and think she realized a major line had been crossed, which is why she immediately came up to me and apologized. I can appreciate what she was trying to accomplish that night, but I think she was trying to fix something that was beyond repair. It took us a couple of weeks to recover from that night, but we were eventually able to move on.

Another thing I found interesting about the episode – hearing all the name-calling Pilar did when she was around others or in front of the camera. Pilar has gone on and on about how we were always talking behind her back about her. I’m pretty sure I’ve told her directly exactly how I feel. I watched the episode and heard Pilar call us (Chanita and I) swine and “have nots.” Apparently neither of those are as bad as calling someone a “bitch.” She called me a green-eyed monster insinuating, like many have just come out and said over the last couple of months, that I am jealous of her. What bothered me the most is when she portrayed me as someone who is not grateful and thankful for what I’ve been given which can’t be further from the truth. I can say this as loud and as often as possible, but what good will it do if people think the “real” me is what they see in a show as drama-filled as possible edited into 22-minutes a week? Would anyone care if I had been accurately portrayed as someone content with her life?

The “have vs. have not”-theme was engrained in viewers from episode one – it made it easy for people to call Chanita and I jealous and bitter when the issue of money and status, and the alleged lack of it, has been the central theme of our season. I couldn’t quite put my finger on why I was so bothered by the finale. Then it hit me – I have never felt like a “have not” until I watched the final show. All this time I’ve considered myself a “have.” I have a healthy family, we have a roof over our heads, we have jobs and income. While we aren’t as financially secure as we used to be, we have been given plenty. I have an education and career. Ryan and I were so grateful every time he stepped foot onto an NFL field that we weren’t consumed with superstar status and I’d never contemplated that we weren’t “haves.” All this, and I was portrayed on the show as not being content with my life. To add insult to injury, the one person who actually did focus her attention on status and money during production was portrayed as the victim of relentless, unprovoked bashing and hatred, which couldn’t have been further from the truth. We’d all been told Pilar was the “name” behind our show – were the storytellers protecting the “have” to make sure she wants to come back if there is a season two at the expense of the “have nots?” It sure seemed that way to me.

The season finale lacked closure, but luckily for us, we had plenty in real life. The argument after my vow renewal in the last episode actually took place on the last day of filming. Right after we shot that scene, everyone congregated at Amanda’s house for one last hoorah. Well, almost everyone. Amanda said in New York, “You are who you hang out with.” I think back to the love and camaraderie that filled that room when we wrapped and I figure, I’m in good company.

2010 Sam's Club Dream Drive

2010-12-17T00:26:00.002-05:00

The real life football wives got together today in Grapevine to shop for the families. For the fourth year in a row, Off the Field (the national football wives association) teamed up with Sam's Club to make the holidays extra special for 100 deserving families across the country selected by the Salvation Army. Each family received $800 in gifts that we hand selected at Sam's Club, and they are each getting a $200 gift card! The best part of the day - hanging out with the other Football Wives - Amandy, Melani, and Brittany. Always good times!

Reality Confessions

2010-12-14T22:36:00.004-05:00

Pathetic. Jealous. Hater. Liar. Ugly. Fake. Broke. Bitch. Hoe.

These are just a few of the names I've been called repeatedly since Football Wives premiered two months ago. I joke that I can always tell when a rerun is airing because the name calling picks up on the social networking sites. Honestly, those are just the names I care to repeat - I've been called much, much worse by folks on blogs, twitter, and Facebook. I've had people say they hope Ryan and I get divorced and/or go broke and lose our home. A while back, someone made an incredibly inappropriate comment about us having a special needs child that made me speechless. I do what I can to block and avoid the repeat offenders on Facebook and Twitter, but the comments are there and often hard to miss.

When I signed on to be a part of the cast, Ryan and I had a talk about the implications of being a part of Football Wives. There would be wonderful benefits - getting to hang out with the ladies and have fun, promoting autism awareness, maybe going on a cast trip somewhere fun and exciting. I was also well aware of the fact that not everyone would like me and I would have to try to prepare myself for the negativity. We experienced this positive vs. negative dichotomy during Ryan's football years. Everyone loves football players, but when things are going bad for the team or you make a mistake on the field, you're everyone's worst enemy. That can be the loneliest feeling. Fans are especially brutal on team fan pages and message boards. I am now experiencing what Ryan did for all of those years - and I understand now why he wouldn't log in to see what folks were saying about him or the team.

My mom called me a couple weeks ago crying. She heard what people were saying on the blogs and she told me she was worried. She cried - I'm her daughter, the wife of Ryan Neufeld, mom to Will and Bryn - not a hoe, slut, groupie, etc. She couldn't believe what she was hearing and that people could be so cruel.

We spent four brutally hot Texas summer months shooting Football Wives. Being on the cast was work - there were some days when we'd have three or four shoots on the same day, all while trying to continue to maintain our "reality" - going to work, taking care of the kids. It was hard and exhausting. After the first couple of weeks of shooting, the different character personalities started defining us and what our roles were to be. Chanita was the loud, dramatic one. I was the broke, anorexic, alcoholic. Brittany was just the girlfriend. Melani was the calm, quiet one. Amanda was the loving giver - there was always really good food at Amanda's house when we shoot on location in Starwood.

Problem with these labels is that they were often wrong and inaccurate. Let's start with me - I'm skinny, but certainly not anorexic. I like to drink on occasion - true alcoholics drink a lot everyday if I'm correct. Lastly, I'm broke. Well, not quite. We don't have money like we used to but our bills are getting paid. We won't be taking any fancy vacations any time soon, but we certainly aren't broke. And this is where the ones who obsess and wait for me to post get going. If I've gone off on Pilar in an episode, I'm now the broke-*ss alcoholic who has had too much to drink. I'm not an alcoholic - far from one - but I had to learn I can't defend myself everytime someone defames me. I signed up for some of this by agreeing to be on the cast - I just wasn't prepared for it.

When I hear the words being used towards me, I initially laugh because they are so inaccurate. But when you hear the words over and over, oftentimes coming from the same set of people, it starts wearing down on you. It gets old and you hate to spend time trying to defend the truth. Then you realize you can't. I get mad and sad. I haven't wanted to get out of bed and face the day sometimes because of the cyberbullying directed at our cast, but had to because of the kids and work. These have been comments made by people who are complete strangers, people who don't know me, who question why I was on the show. I wonder if these bullies even watch the show. Some of them don't - they rant about things that don't even happen in an episode.

We had four months of film that an editing team sliced and diced into 8 22-minute shows. That's no easy feat. Hours upon hours of footage on the cutting room floor with less than 3 hours worth of television good enough to make our Football Wives product to sell. I was happy when I was asked to write the blogs for the show - I realized something like this was needed to fill in viewers about what pieces of the puzzle were missing on the cutting room floor.

I spend a lot of time on my VH1 blogs - it usually takes a good two to three hours to complete one entry (none are compensated for). These blogs are MY blogs - it's my forum to tell viewers what they might have missed. Why was Chanita so mad with me? Why did I throw the cookie? Why Pilar didn't go to the hospital. I spent so much time writing these blogs hoping people would truly be able to enjoy the show with the missing pieces. Instead, my blog has become a breeding ground for vultures waiting to bounce and tear up my blog the minute it's posted. Note that I didn't say they wait until they read it - their comments don't have anything to do with what I'd written about. I hear stuff like this a lot, "Dawn is so jealous and hates Pilar." I'm pretty sure you can find that post somewhere under my Football Wives blog after the football game. The same people come in week after week and say the most horribly degrading things. The language is terrible - I certainly don't think they would speak to a family member or someone they love this way. The anononymity of the internet has become a frightening beast - people can do so much damage when they have no self control. They say what they say without consequence.

On a recent day after a brutal internet lashing after Football Wives aired, I was feeling pretty down. One can only take so much abuse - they will eventually crack. The stuff that went on with Pilar while filming is nothing compared to the horrible experience Football Wives has since become. People are tired of the drama - they don't want to see us fighting anymore. Well guess what? ME TOO! But I have absolutely no control over that - the folks that edit the show have that privilege. Maybe they are the more appropriate parties to denigrate.

At the end of the day, it's a reality show made for television. In my blog, I write what I experienced and what really happened. People might have their own ideas of what could or should've happened - they should go write their own blog. I'm going to keep writing me - and people should learn to lighten up.

This week's Football Wives blog...

2010-12-14T13:07:00.003-05:00

What a fun episode! I really enjoyed watching the vow renewal ceremony - it was so incredibly sweet! I have to admit that I was thoroughly disappointed that it appeared any of us gave a hoot that Pilar wasn't there - I certainly didn't. But I had a reason for asking why she was there! Check out my latest blog post. And be sure to check out our season finale this weekend - not sure if we're getting a second season yet, but I sure hope so! We have lots of unfinished business!

Dawn Neufeld’s Playbook - Football Wives Episode 7

Got Me!

I’m not easy to surprise. As a lawyer, I’ve been trained to analyze facts and situations. I ask questions when things don’t make sense. I always have a plan. So when Ryan tried to surprise me several years ago with a week-long trip to a resort in Mexico, I asked so many questions he finally had to reveal his secret and I ruined the surprise. That was the last time Ryan contemplated spontaneity with me – until now.

In addition to our busy Football Wives shooting schedule, I was working my regular job and trying to squeeze in auditions. I was busier than ever and was on autopilot – there wasn’t a lot of time for analyzing the craziness that was my life for the months we were in production. The show producers came to me and told me we were going to plan a special event and as busy as I was, when I heard the plan I was all in. Chanita tells a hilarious story about how she and George got married in their living room during training camp with three fat offensive lineman as witnesses. She talked all the time about how they didn’t have a real wedding, so when the producers came to me and said they wanted to plan a wedding ceremony for George and Chanita, I was all for it!

The plan was for me to pick a fight with Chanita to preoccupy her so we could plan the surprise - I’d talk about her kids or something so she’d contemplate walking me like a dog again. And I tried – we sat at lunch one day and I started going in on her trying to upset her. At one point, knowing how she feels about her kids and Pilar (areas of sensitivity), I even suggested Pilar might be a better mother than Chanita. It should’ve tipped me off that Chanita didn’t go absolutely ham on me that day – I was so focused on trying to upset her that I ignored her uncharacteristic level-headedness. I felt like I’d failed in my mission to set Chanita off – I was bummed.

Earlier that week, I also started asking questions that could have totally ruined the surprise. I asked Ryan about how George was going to leave the team in Omaha to come down for a surprise wedding. Football players miss all sorts of big events during the football season – weddings, babies being born, funerals – football comes first at all cost during the season. Not only did George have a game the day after the scheduled ceremony, but it was an away game in Las Vegas. He should have been traveling with his team, not getting married in Dallas. Ryan deflected my questions – he said the coaches must’ve approved it. That never would’ve happened in the NFL – but I was assured George would be there for the ceremony so I figured his UFL coaches had been more lenient.

Complicating matters, Will and Bryn were both really sick the week we filmed the scene – they both had missed a couple days of school with illness. I’d even called my production assistant that day and told him I didn’t want to be out too late filming because I wanted to be home taking care of them. I found out after the renewal that the original plan was to include them in the ceremony. A suit had been ordered for Will, a flower girl headpiece and basket ordered for Bryn. I can’t even imagine how sweet that would’ve been.

I tried on five different outfits getting ready for Chanita’s wedding – and Ryan saw every single one of them. I would ask him how something looked and he had the same reaction with each new outfit change: “You look fine.” Little did I know that days earlier, he had my wedding gown smuggled out of the house and dry-cleaned and that it was waiting for me at the hotel.

Ryan left the house a couple of hours before I did – he and George were going to film a scene before the ceremony. We’d had different call times before during production, so I didn’t question this arrangement. When my chauffeur-driven car arrived at the hotel, I didn’t question when we sat outside the hotel for 20 minutes while final arrangements were being made upstairs. We did a lot of waiting while filming Football Wives, and playing the “hurry-up-and-wait” game was par for the course. I still didn’t question anything when my production assistant Tommy escorted me upstairs in the elevator. He laughed when I talked about how hard I’d worked on putting together the perfect outfit for the evening. I couldn’t figure out what was funny. It wasn’t until I was standing outside the hotel suite that it finally hit me that something was up. Where was everyone? Why was I the only cast member standing in the hallway? Wait a minute…

I walked in and saw the cameras pointed at me, then I saw the ladies, including Chanita, all dressed to the nines staring at me. And then I saw my wedding dress – I recognized it immediately and then I realized that the surprise was on me! I had no idea that I’d be renewing my vows that night. I was completely stunned and couldn’t believe Ryan was able to pull this off! I really was speechless. The ladies eventually left to head downstairs while I got dressed and had my makeup done. It took me a while to get ready because I kept crying my makeup off. When I finally pulled it together, I put my wedding dress on. I was a little nervous it wasn’t going to fit – whose dress still fits 10 years after the wedding? Luckily, it fit like a glove!

As I made my way outside, I saw no one but Ryan. He was just as handsome as he was on our wedding day almost 10 years ago. It was such an awesome and special moment. When we finished the vow renewal, I finally had a chance to look around and see who was there – other real-life football wives, my producer and friend from a show I worked on, buddies from Buffalo, co-workers, Buehler. Erin even got Mat to show up (he looks mighty spiffy in a suit by the way). Ryan managed to get so many of our good friends there – I couldn’t believe it! The only person missing was my mom. They tried to get her out to Dallas from Los Angeles, but with such short notice, it was impossible.

I eventually noticed that Pilar wasn’t there and I mentioned the fact to Chanita. I didn’t actually expect her to be there – remember, she told me on the cookie cruise that we aren’t friends and that we’ll never be friends. The only reason her absence was even an issue is because of what viewers didn’t see on this episode. Chanita told me that earlier that day the girls had gone shopping for a back-up wedding dress in case mine didn’t fit. To my surprise, Pilar not only showed up, tried on dresses and helped the ladies pick out my alternate dress, but she even joked that they should throw cookies instead of rice after the ceremony. I thought since she made the effort to help pick out the dress, she might put our differences aside and actually show up to the ceremony. I certainly wasn’t disappointed that she didn’t show up – all of the right people were there that night (including the Football Wives production crew – having them take part in the festivities really made the night special). I was a little surprised she didn’t show up though – if she had, it might have been a step in the right direction to find an amicable solution to our differences.

The party went on that night in Pilar’s absence and we had a blast! I hate that the episode didn’t focus more on the ceremony – viewers would’ve seen “just the girlfriend” Brittany serenade Ryan and I with a beautiful song – that girl can sing! They would’ve also seen the Football Wives engage in a cake fight – Chanita, Erin (in a pricey Herve Leger bandage dress), Brittany and David went at it. There was cake everywhere! It was a fun end to an amazing night – definitely a highlight of my Football Wives experience.

But what’s an episode of Football Wives without a catfight? I’ve made the point before that the cast doesn’t see the show until it airs and we have no idea how our story is going to be edited. I was disappointed to see the confrontation scene after the vow renewal ceremony. Viewers might think that I sought out drama by going to confront Pilar the day after the ceremony. In reality, the confrontation happened a couple of weeks after the renewal. So it’s not like I left my adoring husband and kids during prime bonding time to confront Pilar. I didn’t necessarily want to go out to the pool that day, but I knew it would be a chance to tend to unfinished business before we ended production.

What viewers saw wrapped into a three or four minute argument actually went on for a while. I sat quietly at that table and listened as Pilar and Chanita went back and forth for a while. I had to speak up and set the record straight when Pilar kept saying that I envy and don’t like her. Neither were true. Did I expect Pilar and I to be friends? After Football Wives and events that have since transpired, I don’t think we’ll be BFFs any time soon. But I do think Pilar owes me an apology for being disrespectful. First she told Melani that she had apologized and when Melani called her on it, she changed her tune and proclaimed that she wasn’t going to apologize for defending who she is. Don’t apologize for who you are, but take some responsibility that you are not innocent in the drama. Until Pilar owns up to some of her behavior, she and I have nothing else to talk about.

I think it was a discussion that needed to happen – we had lingering issues that needed to be addressed. The good thing is that everyone got to say what they needed to say that day but nothing was resolved that day. I’ll have to revisit this confrontation after the finale to give a little more insider information about why it went down. With one more episode to go before we call it a wrap on season one of Football Wives, the finale is sure to be intense. Stay tuned…

We need a little Christmas.... Honoring Layla Grace

2010-12-14T12:51:00.003-05:00

Christmas is such a special time. When I think of this time of year, I'm immediately filled with happy memories of family and friends, joy and laughter. The holidays are always my favorite time of year.

For some families, the holidays are a bit more difficult. The Marsh family lost their precious daughter Layla Grace to cancer this year - it will be their first Christmas without her. It will certainly be difficult for them, but even in the midst of their sadness, they are honoring Layla's fight by focusing on the courageous battles of other children fighting the horrible disease.

Check out the Layla Grace Foundation for more information on Layla Grace's 12 Days of Christmas. Please check out their website - www.laylagrace.org or click on the title of this blog and consider making a donation. Please consider giving a gift that will last a lifetime!

My blog is open once again!

2010-12-07T12:19:00.004-05:00

For the past couple of months, I privatized my blog at the request of VH1. Now that we're two weeks out from the end of the season, I figured what the heck, let's open it back up. I haven't blogged enough and I promise I will do more, especially with the holidays coming up.

Some notables over the last couple of weeks...

Will lost his second tooth on Sunday. He was in the bath tub - I checked and the very loose tooth was still there. Not two minutes later, I heard "bye bye tooth." The tooth was gone and nowhere in sight. Since I wasn't going to look for it, the tooth fairy was left a note!

Will also sang in his first ever school program last month! Well, he tried. He got up on stage after practicing for a couple of weeks, but all the people made him a little nervous. He ended up singing all of his songs in the hallway. I was so proud of him for even getting up there in the first place. It was a big step for our special guy.

Today is my mom's 60th birthday! Happy birthday mom!

With the UFL season coming to a close with last week's championship game, it's safe and fair to say that Ryan's professional football career is over. We were so bummed he didn't get picked up this week and that Ryan didn't leave the sport on his own terms. But God has a plan and we'll seek his guidance as we venture into this next chapter of our lives.

Here are my last few blog posts from the VH1 Football Wives site - enjoy!

Dawn Neufeld’s Playbook - Football Wives Episode 4
Tutu much…

This week’s episode of Football Wives covered a mélange of different situations from runway rascals to eternal damnation. Just my opinion (and this is my blog): but there seemed to be too many issues wrapped into one 22-minute episode and I wouldn’t be surprised if some viewers were left saying, “What the H?” If it were up to me, I’d be telling a different story. But here is a little behind-the-scenes information that might help fill in some of the blanks:

One aspect of my life that hasn’t really been featured on Football Wives is that I am an experienced television host. For nearly two years, I co-hosted The Bite, a weekly entertainment television show broadcast in restaurants across the country. I am also host of D210 TV, a local sports and entertainment show. If there’s one thing I’m comfortable doing, it’s getting up on stage with a microphone, interviewing celebrities and hosting events.

When Chanita told me a few days before her Rock Star Rascals fashion show that she’d asked Pilar to host the event, I was upset and felt slighted. I knew she only asked Pilar to emcee because Pilar’s name is more recognizable and having a big name associated with your event can draw a crowd. Because I’m not a “celebrity” (in air quotes), I was relegated to modeling duty with my mini-me Bryn that day. We were ready to rock the runway when Chanita informed me that she hadn’t heard from Pilar and she needed me to host the event. My first thought was, “Oh heck no!” She should’ve asked me to host her event in the first place and I didn’t like being her plan B. I knew Chanita was stressed out and in a bind so I eventually agreed to help – that’s what friends do. But make no mistake – I was mad.

Pilar showed up “on time” minutes before the fashion show began. Truth is we were probably running about an hour behind schedule. In Pilar’s defense, she was hosting a gathering at her home that afternoon (that none of us had been invited to), but she did make the effort to make it to Chanita’s event to fulfill her hosting commitment. Chanita might as well have slapped me across my face when she informed me that Pilar would be emceeing instead of me. We’ve talked a lot about the “haves” and the “have-nots” in the football world. Being made to feel like a “have-not” by a friend was a bit much for me. My issue was not with Pilar that night – it was with Chanita. But I took one for the team and did what I had to do to make the event a success. And I think Chanita learned a big lesson.

Funny story: the fashion show was held at Celebrity Bakery & Café in Dallas. Someone had the brilliant idea of using the shop next to the café as the holding area for the models (aka kids). Problem is – it’s a fur shop! I spent two hours before the show started telling Bryn “stop it” or “don’t touch” because I was afraid she was going to destroy some of the merchandise. I hope the shop owner had insurance because with all of those kids running around with candy-covered hands and glitter-sprayed hair, I’m pretty sure we left some damage behind. I also found it ironic that it was probably 110 degrees outside on a sweltering Dallas summer day and we were surrounded by winter coats. Heat, kids and fur coats don’t mix.
For what it’s worth, I think the fashion show was adorable and the kids were amazing. And it was so much fun to have NFL standout Tim Brown and Dallas Mavericks star Jason Terry sitting in the audience supporting their kids who were featured in the show.

Moving on to Chanita being rushed to the hospital at Amanda’s event – can you say drama?!? Apparently Chanita had a headache most of that day and had been going, going, going as usual. At first, I didn’t realize the situation was so serious and even joked about it when I got into the makeup chair but when Chanita said that her feet were numb, I panicked. You see, we have a fellow real-life football wife who lost her husband this year after he suffered a brain aneurysm. It was the first thing that crossed my mind as Chanita fell to the floor clutching her head. My next thought was to get in touch with George – I called Ryan because I knew he’d know how to get in touch with the team trainer in Omaha, and the trainers always know how to get in touch with the players. When Ryan asked me if I was OK, I lost it because I wasn’t. I was really scared. It was hard seeing Chanita being wheeled away on a gurney. Make sure you tune in next week to see what happened once we got to the hospital.

Another behind-the-scenes funny: Chanita is a commando girl and has no qualms about telling you that she does not like VPLs – visible panty lines (a huge fashion faux pas – VPLs are so not cute). The dress Chanita wore that night was a little tight, a little short. As Chanita was lying on the ground waiting for the paramedics, all I saw were Spanx. I joked how glad I was she decided to put on undergarments for a change or we would’ve seen all of her business. It might’ve made for good television, but I’m glad we were spared.

Did anyone notice that Pilar seemed to strut her stuff on the catwalk with the rest of us? Or that she was standing around looking on while Chanita was being carted off? She made the point several times over the last couple of weeks that she didn’t know what was going on with Chanita that night but from what we saw on the show, it sure looks like she should have because she was apparently there. I’ve made the point before that the cast doesn’t see the show until everyone else does. Hours of footage has to be cut down into a 22-minute show and it is always interesting to us to see how our story is told. We can be as real and authentic as possible while the cameras are rolling, but we’re all susceptible to good old fashioned television editing when all is said and done. While I do believe Pilar knew or should’ve know what was going on that evening, she was not as involved and present as the show made it seem.

Things have been arguably calm so far this season on Football Wives. Some have even criticized the show for being a little boring. After watching the preview for next week’s episode, I have a feeling that’s all about to change…

Dawn Neufeld’s Playbook - Football Wives Episode 5
Cookiegate on the Cookie Cruise!

Pilar has been blowing up the airwaves this week insinuating I am not a good mother, wife and professional because of my behavior on this week’s episode. This coming from the woman who claims that she is the victim of bullying by the Football Wives cast and that she is the innocent party in all of this. This is a tough blog for me to write because I’m a little emotional after watching this episode and reading some of the hateful and disparaging comments online about the incident we jokingly refer to as “Cookiegate.” Of course, I’m referring to the confrontation on the boat where I wasted a perfectly good and tasty chocolate chip cookie by throwing it at Pilar. What in the world would make me so mad that I’d throw a cookie? According to folks on the web, it’s because I’m jealous of Pilar’s beauty and money. Maybe it was a little “liquid courage” that gave me the nerve to tell Pilar how I really felt about her and her behavior. Here is a little behind-the-scenes perspective that might give some insight on how the Cookiegate scandal came to fruition…

Before I delve into the drama, let me explain a little bit about Ryan’s injury and our financial situation. Ryan suffered a relatively minor PCL tear. It’s a minor injury because it doesn’t require surgery and with intense rehab, a player can be back on the field in a couple of weeks. Actually, after Ryan felt the pop in his knee that day, he went on to complete practice - he didn’t even think it was that big of a deal. Ryan was told by his coaches that they planned on bringing him back to Omaha once he completed his rehab. Ryan spent several weeks at a facility in Birmingham, Alabama where he worked tirelessly so that he could be cleared and get back on the field. We were both devastated to hear that Ryan was not on the Nighthawks’ roster on cut day and that, in fact, they had given his number away to another player. Ryan really thought the team was going to stick by him and even hoped that at some point this season, they would bring him back to Omaha if there was a need. So much for loyalty. Unfortunately, this happens A LOT in football. Guys get hurt, they are told they’ll be brought back, then they never hear from the team again.

Bottom line – Ryan got laid off. There was no severance package, no compensation for his time, injury, etc. Many folks in this economy know exactly what this feels like, and they know how hard and difficult finding another job can be. Ryan is currently working for the National Collegiate Scouting Association and is enjoying what he’s doing. But he hates that he wasn’t able to play in what was supposed to be his last football season and hang up his cleats on his own terms.

Moving on, let’s talk about the boat trip and what turned into a screaming match in the middle of Lake Lewisville on a perfect Texas summer day. This is where writing this blog is going to be hard. I cannot address what happened on the boat without talking about my experiences with Pilar leading up to that day. Folks are going to say that I’m just hating on Pilar or that I’m jealous. Neither are true. What I know is that there are a lot of people on Team Pilar – like, a lot of people and they really, really like her and will defend her at my expense. This became apparent to me when I got booed on stage at a club appearance this weekend after I told the crowd to tune into the show to watch me cuss Pilar out. I realized that a lot of people love her public persona – her beauty, wealth and lifestyle are captivating and interesting to people. But it was her blatant disrespect for those around her lucky enough to be graced by her presence that finally pushed me to my breaking point.

As I’ve mentioned in previous blogs, I was open to developing a friendship with Pilar in the beginning and hoped we would do so. I even said the following during one of my early interviews for the show: “I like Pilar. She seems like a nice person and we have a lot in common. I look forward to getting to know her.” We actually had some great interactions early on, from a wonderful dinner at an Italian restaurant to her coming to my house for our going-away barbecue for the guys. Contrary to what Pilar has said, we were not out to get her from the beginning.
I stated in a previous blog that the day we had to drive an hour south at the last minute for Pilar’s boot camp was the beginning of the end for me. I couldn’t understand why in the world we would all be inconvenienced and have to drive so far away to get to boot camp when Pilar’s spacious property (football-field included) and other perfectly suitable locations were available much closer to home. The second I pulled into the parking lot, everything became clear when I saw a sign for the Sanders’ football program. It appeared to me that boot camp had been set up to help promote their football team. Don’t get me wrong – I have no problem with people on reality shows hawking their products and businesses. We were all supportive of each other’s endeavors on our show. But I found out from a close and reliable friend shortly after boot camp that Pilar usually didn’t conduct this fitness program at football practice. I was bothered that we’d all been inconvenienced that day but like Pilar said in the boot camp episode, we should’ve been more appreciative for being allowed into her world.

As taping of Football Wives continued, patterns began to emerge. Pilar would arrive at the scheduled call times and then we’d have to wait for her to apply her makeup which took a while. I can name two specific occasions off the top of my head that I remember this happening – once at a taping at a high-end boutique and another at a cast dinner. For me, time is money – missed hours at work, time away from my family, babysitting, etc. My time is precious, and having to wait for Pilar didn’t make me happy.

Pilar was always very standoffish with us. It seemed as though we were expected to go out of our way to be nice to her (and we always were – very cordial and inviting), but we were lucky if she even spoke to us if the cameras weren’t rolling. I remember one particular evening at a local Mexican restaurant – we had a little time to kill before we started shooting and Pilar went and stood in the corner on her phone while the rest of us hung out. The second we sat down for dinner and the cameras started rolling, she acted like we were all good friends. Pilar made several comments to me that night that rubbed me the wrong way. She made several references to me having a margarita - she would say that I’d had too much to drink and I needed a sip of water. Other cast mates were having cocktails and she didn’t make any comments about their drinking. She went on to say several times that I was so “skinny.” Under normal circumstances, I’d take this as a compliment because I work hard to take care of and maintain my figure. But she kept saying things like, “You need to eat. You’re so skinny.” I interpreted her comments as implying that I might have an eating disorder. I asked another cast mate if she was hearing the same thing and she told me yes. Pilar would later go on to say she was just kidding. I’m not sure when alcoholism or eating disorders became something to joke about but I certainly didn’t think it was funny.

What pushed me over the edge with Pilar was when I confirmed the rumor circulating that Pilar would not let our crew use the restrooms in her palatial home – they had to use the pool house like they were hired help. I understand not letting random strangers into your house to pee, but we worked with the same crew for almost four months and they were amazing! They were always respectful of my space, my home, and my family. They would come into my house and play with my kids and pets. We broke bread together. They really did become a part of the family. It was hard for me to hear that they were being disrespected. I thought I might’ve been making too much about the situation until I recently heard a radio interview in which Pilar addressed the Internet story that said she wouldn’t allow the crew to use one of her 13 bathrooms. During the interview, she never actually denied the allegation. What she said was something along the lines of that she has more than 13 bathrooms and more than 109 acres of land. She went on to say that she doesn’t let just anyone into her home to disrespect it and leave their droppings all over the place. Droppings? Who refers to other human beings using the word “droppings?” If that isn’t disrespectful, I don’t know what is.

My final straw was the evening we took our cast picture – this was the night before we went out on the cookie cruise. We’d gathered at a beautiful home in Westlake, Texas for the shoot and the incredibly generous homeowners set us up in their fully-equipped gym with all the necessary facilities to get ready. Pilar walked in with the homeowner, saw the room we were in and then asked if there was somewhere else she could change. She has since said that the room was “too crowded.” It seemed to work for the rest of us. It upset me that she wouldn’t let the crew impose on her and her home by using her bathroom facilities, but she’d impose on this homeowner and insist on changing somewhere else. I knew Pilar was in ear shot of me that night when I voiced my disapproval of her behavior because I could hear her giggling in the nearby room. You could’ve cut the tension that night with a knife as we sat for our cast picture. It was very clear that evening that a definitive line had been drawn. It did seem like “everyone vs. Pilar,” but not without good reason. I know a lot of these examples may seem like small and petty things to get upset about, but when they happen over and over again over a short period of time, it’s easy to get fed up and have enough!

That’s exactly what happened on the cookie cruise. We got on the boat that evening ready to have a good time. Pilar came on the cruise because she had to – not because she wanted to. I can’t blame her – no one was really happy with her at that point, which is why Melani had a point when she said to us that Pilar was “brave” for getting on the boat. Pilar did get on the boat, posted up in her seat, and got on her phone as usual. At one point we were taking a cast picture – after taking one without Pilar, I asked her to get in the picture. After all, we are a cast and I wanted my memories of the Football Wives experience to include all of us. She initially protested and said no. I asked again and she agreed. The calm before the storm…

We were about two hours into the cruise before all hell broke loose. We’d been having an amazing time – taking turns on the pole, enjoying the sunset and goofing around – just having fun. Chanita even threw my flip flop into the lake after the other one fell in. We just laughed about it. Things got serious when Amanda asked why Pilar didn’t show any concern about Chanita being in the hospital. I can tell you this – I certainly wouldn’t have expected Pilar to go out of her way to visit Chanita in the hospital or at home. They aren’t friends so why would she? What I did expect was that she would show some concern, and she didn’t. Watching last night’s episode confirmed to me that Chanita’s health was not on Pilar’s radar as something to be concerned about.

Then it happened – Pilar lied about not knowing what was going on with Chanita (as confirmed by Erin who doesn’t say a lot, but when she does, it’s golden). I just couldn’t take it anymore. Yes, I was disrespectful to Pilar on that boat but she’d lost my respect a long time ago. As she talked to me in her condescending tones, calling me “sweetie” and “honey,” I had just had it. The only thing in my hand was a cookie, so I threw it. I did not throw the cookie at her – my aim is pretty good and if I wanted to hit her, I would’ve. But I also know that I might’ve been the target of a battery lawsuit if it had, and I wasn’t going to subject myself to that. And remember when Pilar “joked” about me being skinny at the restaurant? She sure did tell me to sit my skinny behind down on the boat. I bet she was joking then too.

I can take full responsibility for the language I used on the cruise, but I will not back down for standing up for what I believe is right. I hope that at some point, Pilar might take some responsibility for her part in this – she is not innocent. Pilar said on the boat that night that we’re not friends, we will never be friends, that I’m never invited to her house, and that I want her life. Why on earth would I be cordial to someone who has been so rude and disrespectful to me? She let me know exactly how she felt about me on the cruise that night – and I didn’t mince words either. You do see me shut up at one point though – nothing was getting accomplished and I was tired of the drama. I was over it.

I know this was a long blog but I had to tell what happened behind-the-scenes so people had a better understanding of why I blew up. People say that I am jealous of Pilar because of her money and beauty. If it’s the money, wouldn’t I be hatin’ on Amanda too? Amanda is loaded – like tens of millions of dollars loaded – but I love her to death and she has become a great friend from shooting the show. So is it beauty? I think Pilar is stunning. I said it – STUNNING! She is a beautiful, beautiful woman. But I’ve been around plenty of beautiful women and beauty is certainly not something I covet – that would make me pretty shallow.
If Pilar takes issue with anything I’ve said in this blog, she is more than welcome to post her own blog entry – and I encourage her to do so if I somehow misinterpreted her behavior.

Make sure you tune in for the next episode - Pilar and I aren’t done yet. But you’ll also see what can happen when we push our issues aside in the name of football.

Dawn Neufeld’s Playbook - Football Wives Episode 6

I loved this episode of Football Wives! There is so much to talk about – galas, hating, transitioning and teamwork – there is a little something for everyone, and here’s my behind-the-scenes take on it all!

We went horseback riding the day after the boat ride and tensions were high. Amanda and Chanita declined Pilar’s invitation to attend and I had serious reservations, but I truly thought it might be a good opportunity to try to work things out. We hit up Nash Farm in Grapevine and even though things were obviously tense, we managed to have a good time before sitting down for lunch. The horses were a little out of control that day – Erin’s horse even tried to buck her off. Turns out a big storm hit about 30 minutes after we left – I guess they knew something was brewing.

I had to chuckle watching the show when Pilar commented that I was sitting across from her. The picnic table was rather cozy – I’m not sure where she wanted me to sit. Anyway, I was hungry and knew I wanted to extend an invitation to talk privately about what happened on the cookie cruise.

Brittany, Erin and I immediately started joking about drinking when we sat down. We’d been provided with water and soft drinks – horseback riding and alcohol consumption don’t really mix so there was no alcohol being served that day (bummer). As the conversation continued, the ladies began chatting about the boat. Pilar did imply that Ryan and George “let” all that nonsense (a.k.a. Cookiegate) go down. Like Chanita doesn’t like liars, thieves and folks who can’t drive, I don’t like it when people disrespect or talk about my family. What viewers didn’t see during the cookie cruise was Ryan turn around at one point and ask me if I was OK. If I had said, “No,” I promise you he would’ve intervened. I told him I was fine, and since he knows I can fight my own battles, he stayed out of it. I was so upset that Pilar would even go there and discuss the husbands as if I wasn’t sitting right in front of her, and while several retorts instantly popped into my mind, I really, really wanted to avoid another argument so I kept them to myself and invited her over to chat.

Since Pilar told me on the boat that I was never invited to her house, I figured I’d invite her to mine for a one-on-one talk. I don’t know if I was actually expecting Pilar to accept my invitation but I was hoping she would. I really do think it could’ve been a good opportunity to put our issues on the table. I never thought we’d become best buds, but I did think we could acknowledge and respect our differences and move on. I apologized for my part in the disagreement and asked her to do the same, and she refused. When Pilar declined the invite, I was done but she kept going when I had made it clear I had no intentions of having that discussion that day. By now, viewers should know that if the Jazzmaster gets jazzy, I’m not going to back down.

Pilar told me she was “saving me” - I do wonder from what. Eternal damnation? Her wrath? Jazz hands or spirit fingers? Was she going to throw a sandwich at me? You then hear me say, “Praise the Lord,” and, “Make sure you answer your phone that way.” Pilar does, in fact, answer her phone that way. For some of us, “Praise the Lord” or “PTL” as we like to call it has become a bit of a joke. It may come up in the next couple of episodes – you’ll have to tune in to see.

Fast forward a week to the football game. There is DRA-MA behind this scene that viewers didn’t get to see, but you know I’m going to tell you about it. It was brought to my attention earlier in the week that Pilar was upset that I “assaulted” her with a cookie on the cruise. It’s my understanding that she thought the reason Mercedes left the show was because she threw a pen at Chanita and that because I threw something at her, I should be excused from the cast. I was not happy that Pilar tried to get me kicked off the show and that certainly wasn’t going to help us repair any relationship we might have had.

The day of the football game was actually my son Will’s 6th birthday. We’d had a wonderful birthday dinner for him that evening. Shortly before we left for the football field, I received a phone call that Pilar had decided SHE was ready to talk, and that we’d talk before the football game. Call me selfish, but I was having none of it. I’d extended the olive branch and she turned me down – I was not willing to do things on her terms, especially not on my son’s birthday. Like I said before – I was done.

To show you how over the drama I was, go back and watch the football scene. I had on a red shirt that was folded up. Why? Early that week, I’d had Chanita make the shirt and it said “PTL” across the front. Knowing that Pilar would’ve picked up on my message and the drama it would’ve caused, I decided not to show it. Contrary to what a lot of people think, I do not hate Pilar, nor do I like the conflict between us – the nonsense has been so physically and emotionally draining (a point I bet she and I agree on). I was not going to go out of my way to create more drama for the sake of good television. We ended up having a great time that night – and honestly, it was a very cool experience! Think about it – we played a football game while Rocket Ismail, Deion Sanders, Ryan Neufeld, Leonard Davis and David Buehler coaching, cheering and watching from the sidelines. It was a once-in-a-lifetime experience, although I think we’d all be up for a rematch!

This episode had some other really great moments that have to be discussed. Let’s start with Chanita and Brittany standing outside the club when the panty-less drunk girl (now that was a good example of someone with liquid courage) goes off on the ladies. As football wives, we often encounter this during games and in the media – like Brittany said, when everything is great, you’re a hero. When players make mistakes (because, alas, they are human), they become targets. I laughed when Chanita referred to George as “False-Start Foster.” I remember sitting in the stands during a game in Buffalo when Ryan had three holding penalties called on him. It’s hard not to react every time an anonymous someone cusses out your husband or tells him he hopes he loses his job. It’s an unfortunate aspect of the game that we have to learn to live with. Just-a-girlfriend Brittany has already learned this tough lesson.

One aspect of our lives that has been overshadowed by the drama is our community service involvement. Football wives are very involved in charitable work – it’s our way of giving back. Many pro-athletes have their own foundations and often-times the wives are running them. George and Chanita felt their heartstrings tugged on a trip to Swaziland. Recognizing a need for support and education, they created Beyond the Game. Chanita lives, eats, sleeps and breathes this foundation and I was so excited to support the charity by attending her black-tie event. Melani’s performance was the absolute highlight of that night for me though. She is such an amazing performer and I remember glancing up at Rocket on the stairs beaming at her with pride. You can check out more of Melani’s music at melaniismail.com. She really made the charity event special.

One of the things they didn’t show on Football Wives was our shopping trip to Tootsies in Dallas where we tried on amazing black tie gowns for Chanita’s event. I tried on this stunning Monique Lhuillier chocolate chiffon gown with gold beading – it fit like a glove! But it was also $5,500! Needless to say, that dress stayed at Tootsies. The night of the gala, our resident fashionista Erin showed up in a amazing ensemble and sure enough, she had a Monique Lhuillier skirt that was fabulous! All the ladies that showed up looked amazing that night.

While Chanita and I attended the Willis & Woy wives event, the Dallas ladies were attending another incredible gala. Erin made the following statement on Facebook and I wanted to share it because she hits the nail on the head:

“*Note* I don’t say a lot but when something important gets overlooked I feel the need to speak out. That “gala” that the Dallas Cowboys Women were at was the biggest fundraiser for the SPCA of Texas. The Dallas Cowboys Women’s Association raised over $100,000 for the SPCA of Texas at an event held prior to Football Wives taping so we were offered a table. Not the only cause we benefit. Also overlooked was Amanda’s shopping event at Blinc. A portion of the proceeds from that shopping night were donated to gulf restoration efforts. I could go on about the amazing things these current and former NFL wives do, but apparently this is a show focused on drama so I will spare you those details.”

I’m telling you – Erin doesn’t say much but when she does, it’s GOLDEN!

I know what’s coming up on the next episode and it is so sweet – I hope you tune in to check it out. You don’t want to miss it. In the meantime, check out a few of the other charitable organizations the ladies of Football Wives support!

Dawn Neufeld
Garth Brooks’ Teammates for Kids Foundation
Layla Grace Foundation
Tacke Cancer Foundation

Melani Ismail
Women Called Moses